Coming your way once a week, join me on a whimsical, informative and at times profound journey into the depths of healing the soul………..mine……..yours………..the whole planet!
Coming your way once a week, join me on a whimsical, informative and at times profound journey into the depths of healing the soul………..mine……..yours………..the whole planet!
For those who read my last post the Heal Yourself Expo was a great success and created a lovely laid back energy even as if offered true seekers a variety of alternative viewpoints on health and well-being. I had a rewarding couple of days and look forward to an event that grows and evolves over time even as it carefully keeps itself small and intimate. Less razzle dazzle and more education and empowerment! http://www.healyourselfexpo.com/ My focus at the moment with my health is the transition that I am currently experiencing which will take me from mothering to crone. Yes I am finally feeling menopause in my body and it is an interesting and sometimes very uncomfortable journey.
My moon time flow has never been regular and in the fifteen or so years that I’ve been keeping track I have never been able to discern a pattern. But that it is beginning to cease is obvious now and I spend a lot of time with the impending feel of the changing of the blood without the relief of it’s arrival. It is hard to describe what this feels like, there are times when I get cramping pains but a lot of the time the sensations are much more subtle than that but pervasive nonetheless. There is a sensation in my belly that sweeps through and for some reason is full of doom and gloom. At this point I am filled with gratitude for the mindfulness practices that I have put energy and focus into as it is relatively easy to notice my mind trying to justify the anxiety in my uneasy belly. I am very firm as I separate the sensation from the dark feelings and tell myself that it is a feeling that has no base in my tangible reality.
Sometimes I get this rush of energy through my body that feels like it wants to burst out of my skin. It makes me feel a bit crazy and is often accompanied by intense lust which can be a bit disconcerting for my dear Beloved even as he welcomes my ongoing horniness! I am so blessed because my beautiful lover allows me to express these intense feelings by groping him rather crudely at times and making strange noises. Some of you are probably wondering why anyone would have a problem with this but the “Libido Monster” does feel a bit out of control and can be overwhelming for us both. I have heard that some women lose interest in sex while they are going through menopause so I guess we can be grateful that our wonderful sex life will continue unabated!
This exploration has been from the inside so far as I observe thoughts, feelings and sensations as they occur in my body. But I am lucky that one of my 50th birthday presents was a book called “New Menopausal Years: The Wise Women’s Way” by Susan S Weed. I haven’t found the time to read it yet but it apparently goes through all the different options for navigating menopause, from the bio-medical model to herbal and natural therapies. I will get to my reading in due course and in the meantime observe my body as it rides the wave into the next stage of being a woman. An exciting new adventure in the ongoing drama of being a human on Planet Earth!
In my last post I talked about the satisfaction and the health benefits that come with caring about other people and finding ways to be of service in the community. This can be done as a volunteer of course and there is a particular feeling of reward that you get when you are offering your time to help others without any financial benefit. But we all need money to live so what if your job could be something that not only supports you but also makes a valuable contribution to the community. This is something I’ve been working on for years and with some real issues of self-worth coming up in relation to money it hasn’t been an easy path. In our current Western culture it can often be hard to find a higher purpose to life but without that sense of meaning we are like zombies in an automated world, collecting more and more stuff!
So I am very excited to be offering Intuitive Counselling at the “Heal Yourself Expo” in Maroochydore this coming weekend. It’s an opportunity for a very small business like myself to connect with those who are seeking healing and a greater purpose to their lives. If I end up being very busy I will miss the presentations but that will mean I am getting to help lots of people who are genuine seekers. Helping other souls to expand and grow and evolve as human beings, sounds like a good time to me! Ultimately those who are doing this kind of work will do themselves out of a job but when we get to that place it won’t be necessary for anyone to have a ‘job’. That is a statement that many people would consider crazy but with the technology available now there really isn’t any need for everyone to work for a living.
The expo is the sort of environment where those who do question the status quo and want to know about alternatives for health and well-being can explore a range of possibilities. And a big part of what people will gain from this sort of exploration is that they have the power to heal themselves. Nothing wrong with being inspired by others but at the end of the day you are the only one who can create change within yourself. And if you change then the world changes around you. Seemingly insurmountable problems can disappear in the blink of an eye even though you may appear to have ‘done’ nothing on the surface. I once went from complete overwhelm when I was studying and working to being calm and in control, simply by putting some crystals and a photo of myself on an altar and saying a prayer. If you would like to hear that story check out the post “My Strawberry Heart“.
So if you live somewhere near the Sunshine Coast in Queensland and you are a seeker, come and say hello. There will be talks on a wide range of subjects and interesting stalls to look at, I’m expecting it to be a stimulating and inspiring weekend. Here is the website for the event: http://www.healyourselfexpo.com/
I’ve been a bit stressy the last few weeks for lots of different reasons so it is with a sense of great relief that I can declare myself as extremely chilled! Some of this is due to actual events but a lot of it has to do with the big changes that my internal beliefs have gone through. When my Beloved hit some bureaucratic snags that affect our income I did not go into gloom and doom, my focus was rather on all the good stuff that is happening instead. And I made a conscious decision that I was prepared to let go of anything that wasn’t absolutely necessary to our survival including the trip for my brother’s wedding. I didn’t contract over money in fact I suggested we go out for dinner and guess what, the world didn’t end. Not only did the world not end but other changes have taken a whole lot of pressure away from the goals I’ve been striving for and it is all looking very achievable.
What is really getting me excited is that I responded positively to changing events even when they seemed negative. I found things to be grateful for and took the opportunity to take care of myself by going to yoga and meditation and then having a very relaxing weekend. I was already chilled when the bits of good news came through so things just got better and better! So no matter how hard it might seem to have a practice of gratitude or meditation or yoga, it really is worth doing whether the results are instant or take a lot of time. Having a sense of purpose helps a lot as it can keep you on track with what you are doing even when it seems like nothing is happening. Interpreting events in positive ways is also very helpful and giving focus to those things will pay off in how you feel about life in general.
Being generous is also a factor in having a sense of well-being in your life, the article at the end of this post talks about ways in which you can improve the skills that will help you to become healthier and happier. Helping other people feels good and there are numerous studies that demonstrate the truth of this. Become a regular volunteer and you will increase your chance of living longer and enjoying your time on the planet a whole lot more! I’ve been pretty busy and stressed out but that hasn’t stopped me from volunteering at my local neighbourhood centre for a few hours each week and it is contributing to my sense of well-being. Neuroscience is showing us that being kind and compassionate is good for our neurons so if you want to be really healthy it’s time to be nice at every opportunity. And don’t forget to include yourself in that approach!
Here’s the article I mentioned:
My gratitude practice was severely strained last week as I struggled to find something to be grateful for in the face of bureaucratic nit picking taken to extraordinary lengths. As I do my best to raise funds to get myself and my Beloved to Thailand for my brother’s wedding I can’t even manage to get myself a passport which has to be step number one for any overseas venture. Because my name was spelt Kerri on my birth certificate I have to go through an application to change my name to Kerry, the spelling I have used for the entire length of my 52 years on the planet. And to avoid waiting 67 business days for this absurdity to be processed it is costing me $211 to change something that has come about because of a clerical error. This is a world gone mad where restrictions that are supposed to keep us safe from the bogey man are interfering with ordinary folk trying to go about their everyday business.
Dwelling on that kind of insanity can start to send one quite mad so after having a healthy vent I did my best to find something to be grateful for. The thought of my Beloved sprang forth and began to bring hope back into my heart. Then I decided to ask the Faeries for some help and the card that they sent me was “Raise Your Standards”. One card with one simple message and the flow of tentative thankfulness became a flood of positivity and light. Not exactly great wisdom you might think but what that phrase did for me was shift my focus from lack to abundance. Instead of going into worry over things costing even more I could see that it was only a problem if I didn’t think I could meet the challenge. And bits of me are still a bit unsure and sending messages of doom into my belly even as I put these words into writing.
I’ve never read the book “Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway” by Susan Jeffers, but the phrase has enormous resonance in and of itself. There is a part of me that wants to give up in the face of over the top bureaucracy, it doesn’t believe I have the capacity to earn the money needed so why bother at all. Luckily I have a stubborn streak which won’t let me give up so I will just have to feel all that fear and keep going on the path to abundance. I managed to do 10 minutes of meditation during lunch today so anything is possible! The list goes on, doing yoga classes again, eating healthy and maintaining my recent weight loss, living with the love of my life….. Many of these things seemed quite impossible not so long ago and yet here I am. Life is good and I am grateful!
The world is a very noisy place these days and silence something that many people actively avoid. I consider myself a reasonably conscious human being and yet I find myself doing the very same thing even though I know perfectly well that being silent is a great way of tuning in to deeper feelings and sensations. So what is so hard about simply sitting in silence? On my lunch break when I work a full day I usually go out to the balcony where I can breathe fresh air and see the sky and feel the wind on my face. And I know that once I’ve finished eating that the best way of spending the rest of my break time is to sit in meditation. Then the next thing I know I’m looking at Facebook on my phone and getting caught up in all of that stuff and I only manage a few minutes of actually sitting in stillness.
And yet sitting silently with deep feelings has been a huge part of my healing and growth. I know how valuable it is from my own experience but it is still a struggle to make myself stop and just sit. Our society doesn’t place any value in such an activity and we are indoctrinated at an early age to get out there and do things rather than spend time sitting around daydreaming. The phrase “Silence is Golden” is about being quiet while you work hard at what you’ve been told to do. The idea that there might be some benefit in the space created by silence gets lost as we pursue the next goal or task. Houses are full of the sound of television and our roads resound with engines and brakes and horns.
So how can we rewrite this programming? How can I deliver on my promise to myself to do more regular meditation? Force of will is not a method that appeals to me but as I get more and more frustrated I am ready to try just about anything! Making a witnessed commitment in the last few posts has also been a failure up to this point. I’m feeling tired as I write this and my brain feels completely stymied and yet an answer floats up almost immediately. It consists of one word, gratitude. When you feel grateful your mood shifts and thus it is an elegant way of moving from one state of consciousness to another. So if I am wanting to be quiet and am meeting resistance the best response I can make is to fill that space with all the things that I am grateful for. It almost seems too good to be true but it does give me an easy technique to apply in my quest for inner peace and outer prosperity.
It’s worth a shot anyway, maybe even a gratitude diary where I write down all the things in my life that I am grateful for. As a lover of improvisation I will probably make it up as I go along ! And who knows what will happen as I spend more and more time in meditative spaces, many of the thorny issues I’m currently facing may turn into beautiful roses smelling sweet!
I wonder if being pruned feels to the plant as challenges and obstacles on my path do to me? It can seem quite brutal at times and yet we often look back on such incidences as important lessons that have been pivotal in the process of unfolding into full potential. I am still very much in the thick of my process but even now I can see how the recent and ongoing challenges are shaping me into a space of courage and positivity. Rather than fuss over who ought to be doing what I have taken up the gauntlet and am doing everything I can to reach my goals of happy, fulfilled, independent and meaningful living with my Beloved. My online readings have been launched and there is already positive feedback from that offering, more to come I am sure! The other initiative is a new meditation class that will be launched at the Maleny Yoga Shed tomorrow.
We are going to save the full format of “Buddha Meets Your Body” for workshops and to have the weekly class as a meditation that focuses on bringing awareness into the whole organic being of mind, heart and body. So it’s minus the talking for the most part and aims to give participants an experience which they can take away and reflect on for themselves. It will be simple even when there is movement involved, for the first class people will be lying down for most of it and only moving the body in very subtle ways. When you bring awareness to any part of the body change follows as quickly as a thought can move and shift and change, possibly even quicker than thought in fact. Our bodies have their own wisdom and you never truly know anything until it is known throughout your being. And everything moves with greater ease when you are coming from a place of relaxation, a quality that tends to be undervalued much of the time.
So in the class we focus on relaxing and grounding before embarking on journeys of deep exploration, bringing awareness to deeper and deeper levels of consciousness. I know where we will begin but who knows where it will end up and that is the most exciting part of any expedition into the unknown. My Beloved and I will be learning as we go and excited to hear what others experience in the safe and supportive space that we will be creating for participants. For those who love to dance we will also be offering an hour of dance in the afternoon, “Dance Yourself Open”, from 5-6pm. I have a vision of building community with those who are interested in expanding their inner awareness and taking the understandings gained in meditation class on to the dance floor. And ultimately out into the larger world!
This is a dream that I have………
International Yoga Day at the Maleny Yoga Shed:
Body Awareness Meditation Classes at the Maleny Yoga Shed:
Hooray! At last I am properly organised to offer online and phone readings for those who are not able to come and see me in person. This has been one of those things my Beloved and I have been talking about for ages and ages and finally it is done. Do you sometimes have the experience of knowing what to do but somehow finding it impossible to do certain things however simple they may seem in practice? Well that’s how it’s been for me with this particular enterprise. I can’t give you a formula for how to achieve this but I do know that for some of us this sort of change can only come through a deep shedding.
My Beloved and I spent a few weeks living in a fearful space where it ‘felt’ like our survival was being threatened. We took responsibility for our part in creating the situation and then made our plans to get out as quickly as possible. In this process we both had an enormous shift and for me it had a lot to do with letting go of my fears of being able to survive in the world. When we found a great place to move into straight away it felt like a reward for our response to the life lesson being presented. Even so it is taking quite a bit of processing and constant mindfulness to keep going with the momentum of this big shift. Just because you have let go of stuff doesn’t mean that everything suddenly becomes ‘easy’.
This is the point at which it is easy to get frustrated because you know you have made progress but it doesn’t ‘feel’ like it. You look around yourself and wonder if all the effort you put in to make the shift was actually worth it. This is where the one step at a time policy is absolutely invaluable, identify what tasks need to occur and then tackle them one at a time. So I guess you could put that bit into some kind of formula, but if you have deep issues that are in the way of where you want to go then you will have to go within and find whatever is creating the obstruction. It helps if you can be content without cut and dried answers to your questions too. When connecting to inner realms we are moving within a space where our logical left brain will struggle to make sense of things.
Meditation in some form will help of course but in order for it to work you actually have to do it! I promised myself at least two formal sits after my post last week but I have to ‘fess up and admit that it hasn’t happened. But there have been a few informal moments of going into stillness and even that has helped enormously. So I now solemnly promise that I will sit to meditate for at least two twenty minute sessions in the next week. Being witnessed makes it that much more powerful! And if you are curious about having a reading with me check out the all new Intuitive Counselling page!