Powerless.

The deluge of rain began to lash and the wind howled like a werewolf worshiping the full moon. It got worse and worse at the film society where I spent the afternoon and evening and by the time I got home the power was off. It did come back on after about 10 minutes but when I got up in the morning it was off, and my sunday market was cancelled, no power at the hall and too dangerous for people to be out on the roads.

I was on the most amazing high all day sunday and part of the next day, the storm that was ripping through my town was reflecting the huge shift that was happening inside me. More details of that story to follow in future posts, but suffice to say that I have come back to myself, the change in me is huge and my mother reflected it to me when she said, “I feel like I’ve got you back as you once were as a child.”

Last night was another big release, I feel a little worn out today but I know that I am moving in a direction that will support me in doing the spiritual task that I am here to do. When it’s time for the caterpillar to come out of the cocoon there is a struggle, but without that struggle the butterfly’s wings will never develop and it will never be able to fly.

There is more to shed, I can feel it inside me close to the surface, ready to leave me so that my wings can spread out and so I can take flight. This is what the snake that came to me at the Solstice was telling me, that my transformation was almost upon me. I don’t know exactly what any of this will look like, but that it will be full of wonder and joy, of that I am certain.

I’ve broken my perfect record of a post every day but somehow that doesn’t seem to matter very much, the time without the usual distractions has been well spent. This period of being without electrical power has been an opportunity to tap into my personal power and even as I feel tears brimming at the edge of my being, I know that it will be joy that will follow their release.

Power comes from within us, from a source we all have access to no matter our situation, and now that I can truly say to myself, “I love you”, I have power beyond my wildest imaginings.

Butterfly in flight.