“Your yearning for love is so powerful that I can feel your heart all the time. When you openly love me I can feel your heart, but I can also feel your heart’s yearning when you are angry or sad. To me your heart is always calling even though sometimes I am unable to open with you because your emotions divert me. I may be afraid or distracted and you may be upset, but still I feel your heart’s yearning. And I need to feel your heart. Your yearning draws me back into love’s depth. Your yearning is my invitation into your heart.”
Dear Lover, David Deida, Sounds True, Boulder CO, 2005, p 11.
I think I am beginning to truly understand the power that a woman has in love-making when she stays in her heart and radiates lots of yummy energy. And actually it isn’t just when you are connecting with each other sexually that this process can be happening, just as David Deida says in the above quote, your man needs to feel your heart. Be in that place all the time, when you are washing dishes or taking out the rubbish, if times are tough you will navigate them better when you stay in your heart.
“Deep heart yearning is not a problem to be solved, but a divine pull to open as devotional surrender, as wide as all, now. With or without a man, whether or not you feel worthy, you can offer your heart’s openness through your yearning, right now, as you are.”
David Deida, p 12.
For me this quote sums up in many ways my entire spiritual path, particularly since I embarked on shamanic techniques, ceremony, sound, dance, psychedelics, bodywork and breath work, for the last 13 years. For ten years I took myself on many journeys that all ultimately led to the same place, my own heart, loving myself. In my wonderful home I have re-built the last part of my self-esteem and let go of much of my old patterning in relationship.
Now I am doing it with my man and while the new beginning, the dawning chapter of my opening is a little daunting at times, still we navigate it with good communication and a lot of love. My breasts and in particular the nipples are doorways to expand the heart that open up the channels so that sexual energy can flow, this feels good and can enhance your well-being at any time of the day or night! There are many resources out there my sisters and loving men if you want to find out more about this phenomenon, Diana Richardson’s Tantric Orgasm for women is a wonderful book that talks about this.
But the best research is experiential so go to it my friends, for men on their own the recipe may vary but there is great information out there for all beings wanting to fully express their life energy in the world. Don’t settle for anything less, the path may seem a bit rocky at times but always worth it and never boring, the further I go along the path of the heart the more it becomes an ecstatic journey anyway.
Until further notice celebrate everything! From Saint Germain through Azena Ramada.
As I sit here I would love to say that my burning issue has passed as I move beyond the big party and public acknowledgement of becoming 50 years old. There is some relief involved but the deep letting go that has been going on for the last three months continues so I am keeping on with the colloidal silver. But I am sure that being present with my feelings is the best way to heal all of this, on my own and with my Beloved. I do try not to ignore the physical but surely any condition present in the body has an energetic source, which if treated, will dissolve the physical symptoms.
Just a quick note to you all today as I chill after a wondrous 50th birthday party, here is some of the treasure I received with Smaug guarding the hoard!
The story continues, I am getting very strong physical symptoms that have emerged out of the energies that have been moving through me. They are dark and painful and that is the feeling as my bladder feels like to burst, I am sitting with the feelings and letting them move, also doing spontaneous healing visualisations. Of course I am supposed to be going to see a doctor but I am hoping to avoid that strategy, knocking this out with antibiotics won’t do anything to address the energetic source of the complaint.
A new chapter is often fraught with risks and uncertainties as well as great treasures and rewards, this is very much the case for me at the moment as I navigate my way through this time of birthday celebrations. It began with a couple of big journeys as I sat in my medicine circle over two nights, there was a lot of energy moving and it wasn’t very comfortable, downright tortuous if you must know, but worth it for the light streaming out at the end of the tunnel. I was very aware as I was in the darkness that my willingness to face that part of myself would ultimately help me to sink deeper into the ocean of bliss that is available to us all!
In order to clear, things have to get stirred up in the first place, sometimes in ecstatic spaces and sometimes with a fair bit of discomfort. It’s all a part of the process and the more you are able to accept ‘what is’, the less you suffer. Easy to say not always so simple to put into practice, I try to remember to surrender and let the energy keep moving, breathing into it seems to help.
Through the Vortex 