Life, Death And Weddings!

expensive-wedding-dressIn Western culture we have little left in the way of ritual in our lives and when we do engage in some kind of ceremony the deeper meaning is often lost in the race to spend money and look good. A wedding is not just a chance to have a great party although that is certainly an important aspect. It is also an opportunity for people to come together in community, to connect and in many cases re-connect after long periods of separation. My Beloved and I are particularly looking forward to the eclectic mix that will be the selection of folk coming to help us celebrate our sacred union.

We’ve already started the process of connecting with community by having an art and craft day yesterday where we made lots of paper flowers to decorate the hall in the spirit of the Mexican Day of the Dead. I never realised how easy it is to make beautiful flowers with just crepe paper, pipe cleaners and a pair of scissors. At the end of the day one of my friends made the flowers into big bunches and we hung them all up on the back of a cane bookcase. At this point I am really wishing that we had a camera to take a picture of this amazing riot of colour. So the end result of our efforts was truly captivating but even more wonderful the energy created by a bunch of people coming together to engage in creative play and conversation.

All of this lovely energy will be a part of our wedding day along with the actual physical flowers and will help to create a feeling of happy harmony. Sounds like the perfect atmosphere for an event that will be celebrating relationship as a spiritual practice. And of course in relationship as in life, there is always the shadow as well as the bright, cheery light that we all love. That will be represented by our co-celebrant who will be in black symbolising death and chaos, while the other celebrant will be in white representing life and order. It is so important to have ways of navigating the dark and difficult times in relationship yet this is something that is often ignored in modern society. So when the sweetness is swept away by black thunderstorms people end up projecting their stuff on to each other and the next thing you know they are in the divorce court.

couple-fighting

The alternative is to hang in there and support each other through the difficult times even if you sometimes have no idea what is going on. Your darling is in the depths of depression and there is nothing you can say that will help, well maybe being silent is how you can be supportive. Or simply holding each other without words and letting your bodies do the talking, gaining reassurance from physical contact. If you can stay with the process you will find your relationship deepening as you become even closer. With every challenge and obstacle on our path my Beloved and I have become closer and closer and every day I love him a little bit more. Ain’t love grand!

Big Rainbow

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