We left my counselling session with me chucking away big black blobs that were interrupting the flow of energy in my body, with a little bit of help from my friends, Germain and Michael. This was only the half way point in the process, the next step was to put something more positive in the vacated areas of my being, to fill the space as it were. I ought to mention too, we made sure to purify and transmute the negative energy that was pulled out of me, leave it lying around and it may just end up coming back in. I used St Germain’s violet flame to do this but you could use anything you want, maybe imagine elves tickling the darkness into light and laughter, the only limit is your imagination.
I decided on the qualities I wanted to bring in and arranged them into two sections, the first was self-confidence, authenticity and inspiration, for this I called on St Germain. The other was self-care and nurturing of self and others as well as inner peace, and it was the feminine energy of Mother Mary who came to assist me. For each of these I moved my body and made sounds, Germain was full of laughter and Mary was soft, I found myself caressing my body with great tenderness, in both cases I could feel the appropriate energies coming in very strongly. I did a drawing for each and they are up on my wall now where I can see them easily, it is a beautiful reminder of the positives I am drawing into my life and being.
I have felt a big difference in myself since my session, part of my homework was to ground myself by doing a daily exercise that involves saying my name to the nine directions and then stamping my feet as I say, “I am here, I am safe.” I can safely say that this does work to ground me, I’m also making sure that I touch my bare skin to the earth every day, just holding my staff against my forehead does this really well.
Jean Houston talks about how some African tribes approach problem solving, they dance, sing and dream about the issues as a way of finding solutions. When we do this we are using much more of the totality of who we really are, bringing in our right brains where our genius lies. So if you are trying to solve problems in your life see if you can bring in more of your fullness as you contemplate whatever it is you are trying to achieve, it’s more fun too, and that can only be a good thing!
Here is a link to Jean Houston’s Mythic Life Blog: http://www.jeanhouston.com/blog/?p=69
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Tagged authenticity, counselling, dance, darkness, dream, energy, feminine, grounding, Jean Houston, light, Mother Mary, purify, right brain, sing, St Germain, violet flame
Stepping out of the box, that’s the invitation, I don’t seem to have the time to read “The Art of non-conformity” so maybe I just have to do what my intuition is telling me to. To put myself out there with self-confidence, authenticity, passion, and be ready to receive the potential that flows back to me even if it comes in forms that are unexpected. I made an important shift a couple of days ago, I noticed that when I thought about my writing there was passion and excitement there, but there was also the idea that it took a lot of time and didn’t support me financially. That’s hardly thinking of successful outcomes, there certainly isn’t faith in my vision when I am in the energetic field created by that thought.
So I’ve started describing the time I spend on my writing as work, “I have to go home and work tonight” I said to the girl at the cash register and she looked intensely curious as she asked me what I was working at. I told her I was a writer and it felt good to say it and be witnessed, and I did go home and work on how I was going to get myself out there, as well as write an inspired blog post. Just telling you about it here feels like yet another stage of being witnessed, I can feel my ego getting frightened as I strip away even more of what you are ‘supposed’ to do, and do my best to surrender to what I ‘know’.
Even when knowing, and lived experience don’t seem to be saying the same thing, breathe and surrender, let the larger self be the guide on a journey of opening hearts and letting go………. There are times when we need to allow ourselves to be led by intuition in its purest form, without question, to be in that place truly is why it’s so important to let go of everything that obscures that clear view.
And Animal totems along the way can be our allies on the journey, but that’s another post, until I speak to you again, love and blissings……………
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Tagged authenticity, ego, energy, hearts, intuition, love, passion, self-confidence, surrender, The Art of Non-Conformity, thought, vision, witness, writing
Dear Goddess, will there always be contractions rolling through my being after riding the giddy heights of ecstasy????? After a week of handling my dental woes with depth and authenticity, of walking my talk and putting my money where my mouth is, here I am in the grips of the current which is pulling me down relentlessly into the depths of sadness and loss. Another toning circle today and it seems to have stirred up the dark depths lurking in my core, not misery or despair but such sadness, I feel empty and am doing my best to resist thoughts of how to fill that space.
Feeling so alone in this moment and yet I am aware that it is an illusion, if I so choose I never have far to reach to find a loving heart that will enfold me and hold me. The truth is that my need here is to hold and enfold myself, I’ve only just rebuilt my self-esteem after all, so one has to expect some teething problems in the new model (no pun intended!). Writing about it always helps, somehow it gives me perspective on what I am thinking and feeling, helps me to step back into the role of the observer and truly see what I am doing to myself.
There is nothing in my life that is making me suffer, it is only my perception that makes it so. But I can understand why people get carried away, it seems so real when you are in that feeling state whatever it is, it really is like one of those currents in the sea that can carry you away to drown before you even know what is happening.
So find the thing that helps you to step back from the current and get that larger perspective, see it from the point of view of the sea where that current is only a tiny part of the whole. If you are searching for ways to change your thinking I can recommend Byron Katie, her website is: http://www.thework.com/
“As long as you think that the cause of your problem is “out there”—as long as you think that anyone or anything is responsible for your suffering—the situation is hopeless. It means that you are forever in the role of victim, that you’re suffering in paradise.”
― Byron Katie, Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life
Check this out, just as I am really focusing on the vortex somone sends out this clip from youtube which shows how our entire solar system and the way it moves through space is actually a vortex! There is something truly beautiful about the spiraling movement of the vortex, it reminds me of the shape of DNA, the double helix, simple and elegant, so well designed.
The body knows all of this as it moves through space, responding to music and to nature, and to the inner song that is also playing, the sweet symetry of movement that satisfies on so many different levels. And then if one is witnessed it becomes even more powerful, when truths present themselves to us we can ‘feel’ the authenticity.