Tag Archives: bliss

A Balancing Act, Relax And Take Responsibility.

My Beloved weighs fifteen kilos less than I do, a skinny little runt who must have hollow legs because he certainly doesn’t eat any less! To my fond eyes he is the perfect size but there is a part of me that can’t help feeling a bit envious at his ability to eat everything in sight without seeming consequence. Of course the trick is always to find the best diet for your particular body type and if there are two of you then a certain amount of compromise is probably required.

Men are from mars

It’s the age-old question for those of us women who don’t quite fit the ideal laid out in the current cultural archetypes, is it about health or how you think you should look? Health has been the paramount question for me but lately indulgence has been a bit of a byword and that can definitely go too far at times. The thing is when you improve your diet you do become more sensitive, no matter how often I notice this in my response to food I still seem to need reminders.

be-happy

At the end of the day I want to be happy more than anything else, pretty much the way I am right now except that I’ve noticed it keeps getting better. That’s all pleasure by the way, our capacity for opening to this kind of energy I do believe is infinite. Follow your bliss sounds shallow but it can actually be fairly deep, and if you truly relax and surrender you can go beyond whatever ‘stuff’ you may have picked up along the way. RELAX and enjoy the journey, the one thing you can be sure of is change so try and get comfortable in the flow of life. RESPONSIBILITY is being able to respond to the shifts and changes that inevitably are a part of following our flow, it can be FUN too!

Big Rainbow

So I think I will be fairly relaxed with my food, just watch the sugar thing and try to have a few green smoothies every week. Relaxation is a bit underrated as a quality but I think it is the key to so many of the ways in which to move into new ways of being in the world. So I will continue to spend lots of time with my Beloved, that’s always relaxing whatever we’re doing! And we are going to the joining gathering very soon to present our first workshop together, very exciting!

Remember to have fun!smiley face daisy

Open To Spirit And You Will Be Transformed.

koala-lazing-aboutLiving in a bush sanctuary you get many opportunities to connect with the animal kingdom, horses, spiders, wallabies, birds with all kinds of wonderful plumage, parrots, ducks and owl. My Beloved spotted some movement over in the bush outside the garden as we sat on the back verandah above the water hole, it turned out to be a koala! It was quite big and moving much faster than one usually sees them going, not that one sees them very often in the wild, those that are managing to survive in the changing environment spend about 20 hours a day sleeping up in a tree. No wonder we don’t see them much!

http://www.shamanicjourney.com/article/6156/koala-power-animal-symbol-of-deep-relaxation-and-concentration

I looked up the meaning of koala and wasn’t quite sure how it might apply to my Beloved and I, seemed to me that we were pretty relaxed already and very focused on the things that truly matter to us. It took a few days and a medicine journey, and a day of celebration with my Beloved of our six month anniversary to understand the message that was coming through. It is a message of doing without doing, being in the world but not of it, of following the path of the heart and the body’s desire for bliss, the soul connection to everything that is.

And that happens when you find the still point within you, the dark womb of creation where a field of energy is rippling with potential. It is the ultimate paradox, both still and moving, filled with light and the dark, the polarity of the masculine and the feminine, Shiva and Shakti. There are many paths towards ecstasy but for me they all come through my body sense even if my physical self is not moving. So it is fitting that the first event my Beloved and I facilitate together should be an ecstatic dance night, the night before the shortest day of the year, leading us into the energies of the Winter Solstice.

Gabrielle Roth.

Gabrielle Roth.

Gabrielle Roth has this to say about moving the body:

“If you put the body in motion, you will change. You are meant to move: from flowing to staccato, through chaos into lyric and back into the stillness from which all movement comes………..The spirit in motion heals, expands, circles in and out of the body, moving us through the layers of consciousness from inertia to ecstasy. Open to the spirit, and you will be transformed.”

Maps to Ecstasy, Gabrielle Roth, Nataraj Publ., Novato, CA, 1989.

 

I Stand In Utter Nakedness Before The God Of Love.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERALetting go of pain in lover’s bliss, my waters flow as the memories release, of ancient hurt done long ago, energy moves, and thus it is so. I am held and I am safe, I am held and I am safe. I rise and fall with my breath, my heart filled to overflowing with tender care as I allow the tensions of life’s lessons to fall away, along with all the stories that I have stored and brought again and again to the classroom.

Surely it is time to enter upon the glorious new unfolding that opens out from this place of letting go, of deep release and feelings like rivers that flow eventually to the ocean, the source of all that is. Two travellers are we, determined to heal all of our sorrows, our song is a frequency that clears out the shadow and the shame.

godgoddesstree

Transformation through utter nakedness as I stand before my Beloved, nothing but truth between us and a love that knows no bounds, can not be contained or held within prison bars. My heart opens and my soul becomes a song that takes the slumbering caterpillar and turns it into the butterfly that was always present, flying  into the glorious dawn with wings of many colours.

ecstaticdance

And so I am reborn over and over again, each layer dissolving to reveal the light that is within me, that flows through me………… that holds my essence which never dies. An eternal being living many lives, bringing all the threads together now as the old age comes to its final ending, preparing to sing the stories of humanity’s growth into a new form. Bringing peace and harmony to Mother Earth and all who live within her sheltering arms………….shanti, shanti, shanti……peace, peace, peace.

From The Stillness to Salvation, With Bliss The Medicine Of Choice!

funny-dog-yoga-pose

Intense little period of activity, writing and writing in a much smaller pressure cooker which is sandwiched with languid delight and lots of satisfaction if not a lot of sleep. A recipe to be happy for me in this moment, open to the flow of energy as it charts new pathways long visioned and desired, blood running hot, a slow, sensual way of being that needs to be relaxed into. Yoga reflects this slow movement, spending long moments in stillness of pose, letting go into muscles slowly moving towards their edge, restorative pose with all the support I need, savasana……….still space edged with impatience!

kookaburra

Dancing from moment to moment with animal companions snuggling, kookaburra flies in to deliver his message of truth, passion and laughter, the end of the journey of healing, new growth has already begun. For a full description of this animal totem check this link out: http://solacetemple.wordpress.com/2007/11/10/kookaburra-a-spirit-bird/ Enjoying the space with just me in it even as I long to be entwined once again, one being re-united into the form of two polarities, going in and coming out, out into the cosmos and the stillness, bringing back all of that, into the merge.

Being intensely present to the scene around me, like a movie, and the one on the outside is getting more like the one I play regularly in my temple every day! You can assume by my positive tone that this is a good thing and you would be correct, my outer world has shifted massively in tune with movement in the inner realms, the flow of healthy, happy energy gives one rather a buoyant feeling in fact. I can feel that healing occurring on every level of my being, from the physical to all of the mental, spiritual, emotional realms that form the person that be me in this particular incarnation.

psychedelic2

The more that your life force energy flows wherever it needs to, the happier you will be, even if the road is sometimes a little stony or steep, that effort and the surrender to the flow will bring light unto your sight, truth from your lips, warmth to the heart. And remember what St Germain always used to say:

“Until further notice, celebrate everything!”

From Bliss To Butterflies.

Last week was huge for me, I had three shifts which I would classify as small, large and earth shattering! There was grief in the letting go, fear of loss, and a deep sense of being utterly unworthy to allow myself to fully experience pleasure without condition. The end result was that I was in a state of utter bliss even though I had only had 8 hours sleep in two days. Once again my life force energy is flowing ever more freely and I embrace the joy of being with all my heart.

So I was thinking a week of integration would probably be a good idea, I slept in yesterday, got up and did my oil pulling, an hour of yoga, and then had my green smoothie.  Just when I think I know what the plan is it all changes, all of a sudden a house sit that didn’t happen is on again at short notice for an indeterminate time. It’s good news really, but then I find myself sitting and writing and the sense of stuff moving in my belly is back, it’s like what some people call butterflies but there isn’t anything to be nervous about.

I love my life, but I do have moments when I wonder about this constant processing, why can’t I have longer periods of clarity before things start getting triggered again! The answer is simple but I don’t have to like it, I just happen to have a lot of trauma, in layer upon layer, and I have an obsessive need to keep clearing it away. Can I really heal everything in this lifetime? There are some who would say that’s a crazy ambition, but even though I might have some complaints about the details at times, I keep moving into deeper states of ecstasy, and I am happy most of the time even when I have uncomfortable stuff moving through.

So I guess I will just have to integrate and process simultaneously, after all I do describe myself as a shamanic practitioner and shamans are the ultimate interdimensional multi-taskers!

Shamans transmit to their people in sign, song, and dance the nature of the cosmic geography that has been revealed to them in the process of initiation trances and soul journeys. Map-makers and myth-dancers, shamans live internally in a multi-dimensional realm continuous with so-called ordinary reality.

Joan Halifax (Shaman: The Wounded Healer, New York, Crossroad, 1982. P 66.)

shaman

Embodied Bliss!

I don’t go to the movies that much, but today I saw a film that was soooooo inspiring! If you don’t like opera then it might not be your cup of tea, but for me it lifted me into higher realms of fullness and joy. I am now enjoying a cup of peppermint tea and listening to a cd from mum’s opera collection and the emotion that is in those amazing voices is taking me to that place all over again.

Music has the potential to shift our frequencies into all kinds of different places, and if you know how to listen with your whole body it can really have a profound and positive effect on how you are feeling. In a retreat based on the work of Jean Houston and Robert Masters, I did a trance journey where we dropped into a very deep state of consciousness and then listened to different types of music,  we were then encouraged to listen with every part of our being. Focusing on listening with your skin is especially delicious, there is so much of it to receive the vibrations!

The same idea can be taken into the world of dance, something that I think I have touched on before. Bringing a fuller body awareness into the movement can take you into deep places as you move from your bones, your organs, or indeed your skin. If this intrigues you then check out the work of Bonnie Bainbridge Cohen who developed mind-body centering, an embodied approach to movement.

I love the word embodied, for me it conjures up an exquisite sense of connection with every part of your being, body, mind and spirit. And when you come into that kind of full embodiment it sharpens your senses, so that you perceive the world around you in a much more vivid fashion, you see the beauty and the soul of a tree, feel its energy and feel how that connects with your energy field.

On this occasion it was a film that did the trick, if you are interested it is called “Quartet”, the directorial debut of Dustin Hoffman, amazing performances from a stellar cast, Tom Courtenay deserves an Oscar! There are so many ways to find bliss in a body, mmmmmmmm………. what a yummy journey this is on a beautiful planet called Gaia.

Embodied blissings and love, may you follow your flow, and may you travel safely and well wherever you go.

Billy Connolly, Maggie Smith, Tom Courtenay, Pauline Colllins in Quartet.

Billy Connolly, Maggie Smith, Tom Courtenay, Pauline Colllins in Quartet.

From Bloody Mind to Joy!

My heart is a trembling but not in fear,

my heart is a trembling, clear, clear , clear.

My heart is vibrating like a leaf caught in the winds of change, excitement is the frequency, antici……………..pation! Happiness is a choice and when you choose positive emotions you’re in a win, win, win, situation. Where the loss is a letting go of what no longer serves you, when it’s time for other souls to move on in their own divine timing, when letting go frees you up to be even more of your wonderful self.

The time is upon us and we are the ones we have been waiting for, the new age is birthing and yet again we have a choice, to follow our pain or our bliss. Let the pain be your signpost and may bliss infuse the stones that make up the path to wholeness.I used to choose the painful path a lot, the sharp stones would tear my soles and they would bleed, no wonder I described myself as bloody minded! What I thought was bliss in those days simply took the edge off a pain so deep I could barely acknowledge it’s existence.

That pain made cracks in the very fabric of my being and brought me to a place where I could do naught but dive into the abyss, hoping that there would be light at the end of the tunnel. I travelled through the darkness, the long dark night of the soul, for what seemed like an eon. I did not waver, no matter the blood dripping from my soul, I did not waver from my clear intention, to heal everything in this lifetime!

And now my heart expands with joy, as blissfully I step forth into the path of love, the canyon of desire. So deep a place it reaches into the very heart of our mother, the Earth, and even there it doth not end, for pleasure, like love, is infinite.This warm glow of the life force flow, it fills me to the brim. The fire once held deep inside, now moves through every limb. Through every part of me it goes, I am alive God knows! And so does the Goddess,oh yes, she knows, and grows, and sings, as she dances with light!

Photo by Ulli Hansen and friends.

Photo by Ulli Hansen and friends.

The Sweetness of a Smile.

The babble of voices around me a sea of good humour and contentment, feasting on raw treats in a temple to compassionate living. The little girl in her mother’s arms with the sweetest cheeky smile, discovering the wonders of a leaf, and then a flower.

childsmiling

I feel that sense of wonder, see with the eyes of the child nestling within my heart. But it’s not the child that was, it’s the child that I have become. To bring together all the glory of a freshly incarnated spirit, with wisdom and deep understanding, is to step into a fullness as bright as the stars in the sky above.

childsmiling2

I join the babble of voices as a friend stops by and we talk about the big shifts and changes that have been happening within and without. We share radiance and joy at the incredible nature of life on the planet at this time.

The antennae springing out from my heart ‘feel’ into the world and find it to be good. There must be darkness out there, sadness and dis-ease, but all transforms through the lens of my heart space. It offers acceptance and love, it offers surrender to what is, and through this radiant matrix change becomes possible.

To love without having to be in love, to be in love with self, with life itself. Falling into an ocean of bliss I surrender to my flow which is whispering into my ear of my next destination, hazy in the distance. A state of consciousness as much as a place, time to move on………time to go.

Bodytalk.

And so the detox continues, my lips are still very dry and I’ve had a hint of a rash that is familiar to me, it turns up when I am processing very deep stuff, and often has an important message to convey. It’s only there in a very subtle form, no-one else would know but I feel quite itchy at times just under my bottom lip.

It would have been towards the end of 2003 when I was involved in intense shamanic training in bodywork and breathwork, that I experienced this rash in  a very intense form. I went to a talk by Nityama, a tantric master, just hugging him is enough to trigger an orgasmic state, I got a lot out of his talk on conscious relationships and it got me thinking about the relationship that I had supposedly ended just recently.

It was someone I had a deep bond with and love for, but it was definitely not a conscious relationship, I had ended it because I knew it was doomed but he was still coming to my bed, it can be hard to let go as I’m sure you all know! At the end of that talk I knew I had to finish it completely but a week later I still hadn’t done anything about it.

Then a day or two after a bodywork session this rash started to develop on my face, it was intensely itchy and I had little pustules that wept at night so I had to have a towel on my pillow. I still went to work, life modelling and working in a bookshop, I was determined to work out what the rash was telling me so I refused to suppress it with medication. This went on for four days and then I was talking with my dear buddy Ulli on the phone about it, and we were discussing the significance of where it was occurring on my body, she said, “What is you’re not facing?”

The penny dropped and as soon as I hung up on her I rang my ex and asked him to come visit, he wasn’t surprised when I said we had to finish completely, there was a sense of relief on both our parts. I went to bed that night and when I woke up the rash was well on the way to healing, I had got the message and taken appropriate action.

The message isn’t always as clear as on that occasion, but the body is always talking to us, and it has a deep wisdom we would be wise to tap into. In order to access this space it is necessary to do clearing on the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual levels of our being. I’ve been engaged in this process since the beginning of 2000 but the good news is that for some of you it will be much quicker, I have had a lot of damage to clear which is often the case for those of us engaged in the healing arts.

Either way it is so worth doing, life just gets better and better, there is more joy, pleasure and fun to be had, in fact it’s infinite!! So go ahead and follow your bliss, that’s my plan!

From FaceBook.com/Quantumfractal

From FaceBook.com/Quantumfractal

Flying High.

It all began with the oil pulling, and ended up with me in a state of bliss, feeling enormous gratitude for my wonderful life! You gotta love the ups and downs of existence, provided you know what to do with the bits that feel uncomfortable, they are actually great moments of opportunity if you play your cards right.

Having had a very strange day, I arrived for two hours of dancing feeling an undercurrent of tension, that had nothing to do with where I was or the people I was with. Dancing is always a liberating act for me, but even so I could feel tension around my mouth, and thoughts of lack and scarcity, powered by fear, kept floating up.

I consciously danced them out of my body, when the negative thoughts came I cancelled them, and created new thoughts, “I am Abundant and life is a flow that brings me everything I could ever need or want!” It was a bit challenging at first but I persisted, and slowly but surely I began to feel joy infusing my being. My smile went from being a trifle forced, to a genuine expression of my awakening spirit.

When I came home I managed to bring a dragonfly into my room, it was perched on my skirt and I had to leave it inside, it was flying so high there was no chance of catching it and taking it outside. After dinner I went out again and when I came home the dragonfly was easily caught and released into the garden, a great relief.

The dragonfly represents transformation, and the ability to be flexible and adapt to the ebb and flow of events, the frog is also associated with this totem and can mean abundance, and is connected strongly to water which is the element that represents emotions. So I interpret that as the shifting of old feelings and patterns of thinking, that have stood in the way of me stepping into the fullness of who I am, and allowing myself to experience true abundance on every level of my being.

May the Abundant Universe unfold, as I spread my wings and FLY!!

Dragonfly