Tag Archives: childlike

Becoming Whole.

Moving from house to house I go on my merry, merry way! One night back at mums and then I’m off to play nanny to 6 dogs, two adults and 4 adorable puppies. They’re little fluffy bundles of curly black surging around me, jumping up and licking my feet. I’ll be there for less than a week but it will be fun to be in that puppy energy for a bit, a reminder of fresh eyes and childlike enthusiasm.

Which reflects back to me the child I am continuing to become, infused with bright energy and feeling a sense of optimism about the future. We are all made up of many different aspects of self, the child at various ages, the victim, the lover, the clown………and on and on it goes, for many it ends up being like a dysfunctional family.

In my huge process of shedding I’ve let go of many of the more negative aspects of self, probably the most important was the part of me that thought I was unworthy, not good enough to be prosperous and do well in life. And as I let go of that which no longer serves me I allow room for more positive forces to be revealed, the new child is one of these and Bad Queen is definitely a force for good!

Whenever I think about Bad Queen I feel strength coming into me, a devil-may-care attitude and a sense that I can have whatever I want and to just go for it. You can spend too much time and energy worrying about other people’s feelings, sometimes you just have to do what’s right for you, and if that doesn’t work for someone else then you  accept the consequences and move on. Easy to say, not so sure about easy to do, I will keep you posted on my progress!

So my internal family is starting to become very functional, they are speaking up and being heard,  the communication lines are wide open as the life force energy continues to surge through my being. Just as well I have all this energy, as I frolic with those gorgeous puppies and dance my way through another super busy and inspirational week!

blackpuppys

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The Eyes of a Child.

Have I mentioned I live in paradise, last night I went to see the amazing Linsey Pollak and Miriam Lieberman at the Mary Cairncross cafe in the rainforest. And I am talking rain literally, the phase that keeps coming to mind is, it never rains but it pours! Here in Maleny it either rains or it doesn’t, we have had long dry spells, but when the heavens open they do it with a vengeance.

The downpour was very much a part of the musical score, like an incredibly long rainstick it added to the beauty and inspiration of the evening. No one else was dancing but I hear the music with my body, and my body has to move and express what it’s feeling. The yearning to dance fully, to give myself up to the movement, is getting stronger and stronger, I’m not sure exactly what I’m going to do about it, but something is coming.

And whenever I go out I am connecting with my community, for someone who has been rather solitary, and who still feels a bit shy at times, it’s  a bit of a wonder. Fragments of the old me that haven’t quite left yet, find it difficult to believe that all these people actually see me as worthwhile, there is a caring that I sense which touches me deeply.

If my brother was here he would give me a look, and say that I was indeed ‘touched’, but that’s just his wicked sense of humour. There is love wherever I go and it’s a nourishment that not only fills my heart, but opens it too, I could almost burst with the joy of it.

That joy and sense of wonder is something that is always present when watching Linsey Pollak play his amazing array of instruments. He is a true master, an incredible musical genius, and yet completely humble. You can feel his passion and childlike enthusiasm, and it’s impossible not to be caught up in that wonderful space. He is a reminder that the child is always there within us, the ability to see the world with fresh eyes can be rediscovered, no matter how cynical you may have become.

Here is a small taste of the master, he makes his own instruments too, in this clip he is playing Mr Curly which is made from a very long piece of garden hose and the famous carrot clarinet. Check out YouTube to see the clip where he makes the clarinet out of a carrot, mind blowing!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nXHBOUIc-x8