Tag Archives: feminine

It’s Darkest Before The Dawn.

If the world is a reflection of me then what an earth was I thinking, time to let go of the old bits and pieces lying around, covered in cob webs and giving succour to spiders and other denizens of the micro world. If I can clean the whole house from top to bottom, this aching weariness may dissolve and I will spiral in joyful flight into a future that is a blank page, waiting for me to paint my picture!

cobweb

So ’tis time to let the imagination run wild and to lift this particular soul into a heaven on earth, an earthly choir that rivals the heavenly kind, with halos and glowing auras aglow in the soft moonlight. Sounds of laughter and music and celebration abound in this place of peace, combining solitude with connection in just the right balance, like yin and yang, sun and moon………….masculine and feminine.

christenergy

Bodies filled with vigour and life, taking in the warm sunshine of nature renewed and loved, cared for with the tenderness we offer to the tiny child just departed from the womb, still attached to the placental source of all nourishment. No longer needing to break the softness of entry with blazing lights and harsh first breath, the world has become a safe place for you and me, for us all.

From FaceBook.com/Quantumfractal

From FaceBook.com/Quantumfractal

As I move into completeness of self, my light adds to the growing brilliance beginning to light up the world, more and more souls are joining the awakening of spirit, ushering in an age of harmony and love. Even as the darkness may seem to grow and prosper, know that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel, not just for me, but for all of us, for all of us…………….

It’s always darkest before the dawn
when your world is weary,
when all is dark,
when dreams die and fade away,
and all of life is stark,
take heart in gentle love,
for she waits in the wings,
and where she walks,
fairies dance and angels sing,
though you cannot see her,
she weaves a silken touch,
leaving footprints in the sand,
sprinkling spells and such,
lighting the dampened corridors,
the dark corners of your mind,
leaving you breathless,
bewildered by her kind,
goodness glints in her eyes,
hope is in her arms,
and all you’ve ever dreamed of,
rests sweetly in her charms.

By J. Blagojevic.

My Warrior The Wolf.

So balance between the masculine and the feminine, this has come up for me not only with the Full Moon in Aries and the lunar eclipse, but also in my latest holistic counselling session. I am very comfortable with the feminine side of things, not that there isn’t work to be done there as well, but it isn’t anywhere near as challenging for me as being in my masculine. No doubt this has a lot to do with my father’s suicide when I was fifteen, I don’t really totally trust in male energy, particularly my own.

But if you want to make things happen out in the world you need that kind of energy, it’s the masculine in its postive form that provides and protects and creates right action in alignment with the good of all. We need this energy as much as we need the soft, receptive and nurturing feminine, together they provide the perfect balance so that we can come into our wholeness. It’s about being in that balance as individuals and as a society, at the moment we are still very much in the male dominated patriarchy.

indianbrave

In my counselling session I found an ally to help me with my warrior energy, I saw a Red Indian warrior standing tall and upright, he feels very strong and very clear. The sound that came through was like a wolf howling at the moon, another connection to the eclipse and an animal totem to explore, then I also saw an owl and that made me aware of another presence, a shaman. This is a reminder to me that the energy of the warrior also applies to my inner journeying, it isn’t just about what I do out in the world.

The biggest message from my warrior is to be strong and to be myself, don’t over complicate things so much and when a decision has been made then TAKE ACTION! He is also about divine timing so there is the wisdom in knowing when it is the right time to do things, I need to stop dithering but I also need to aim my arrows straight and true at the correct target.

indianarrow

Aho! (Means I have spoken, often said at the end of stating one’s intention for a ceremony).

Balance In All Things.

So from the New Moon in Libra we have moved into the influence of the Full Moon in Aries, plus it is also a lunar eclipse which apparently makes the energies even more intense. I would expect Aries to be pretty full on, I am no expert on astrology but I have a friend who is a triple Aries, she has spent an amazing life running around non-stop being a catalyst for others. She has always been extremely forthright too and the energy of this Aries eclipse encourages us to take action and to speak our truth.

femalewarrior

Sometimes taking action though can mean actually doing less, my challenge has been to not be overwhelmed by the busyness of my life, part of the message of self-love that came through so strongly with the Libra New Moon. That particular journey is not over my any means but I am no longer feeling overwhelmed so I can safely say that progress has been made, I’ve had to make some compromises but so far it seems to be working well enough.

Another theme that comes out of this astrological time is the balance between individuality and collaboration, something that I often talk about in this blog. More and more we are seeing projects and ideas that offer innovative ways to move into a more conscious expression of community, not just with each other but with everything in our environment. From sustainable cities with roof top gardens and pollinating pathways to tiny homes and a new way of schooling that doesn’t require teachers or a school room.

Vertical garden of the Musee du Quai Branly in Paris, France, created by Patrick Blanc

Vertical garden of the Musee du Quai Branly in Paris, France, created by Patrick Blanc

I’m going to continue exploring the astrological themes in my next post so tune in to a discussion on masculine and feminine energies, generally speaking the world needs to allow the feminine to be expressed more strongly but for me it is the masculine that I need to channel more.

Dear Father Sky, please lend me your strength and determination and the ability to take right action………….so be it, so be it, so be it.

Down The Rabbit Hole.

This is a very nice place to be, happy in myself and happy to encounter the people who pass my way, knowing that my time is always well spent, having no particular investment in certain outcomes. Open to whatever spirit wants to send my way, manifesting out of the quantum soup, but most of all ENJOYING LIFE! It’s supposed to be fun, that was Abraham on dating but you can apply it to the whole of life, it really, truly is supposed to be a fun experience, so milk it for all that it’s worth! And keep shedding the old skins as you sweep into the new chapters that are opening up at every intersection, I’m trying to do them all, it’s a time of fusion of all things.

Coast_Garter_Snake

If I meet my life joyfully it will send that energy back to me multiplied so don’t forget about devotion and loving what you are doing, also have proper time off! I am feeling the need for a moment out of time from my wonderful community, perhaps I can have a day with the land that speaks to me, certainly I can connect with the Mother, she is close to me at this time. I am being held in the soft and yet strong energy of the protective feminine, it keeps me safe even as I am cradled with the greatest of tenderness, always allowing in that which will bring up the qualities to be lost, and those to be found.

Alice in Wonderland.

Alice in Wonderland.

It is a journey into the rabbit hole indeed, Lewis Carroll would be quite at home in the realms of quantum physics, I sometimes see myself as Alice, believing six impossible things before breakfast! The things one is asked to wrap one’s brain around, the only show in town as far as I am concerned, except of course that nothing actually gets left out, because it’s all one anyway!!

Whoo Hoo……….Bring it on…………shanti, shanti, shanti…………

Be yourself, everybody else is taken! from Oscar Wilde, here is Abraham talking about lining up with with who we truly are, alignment with self, or a merging with another in alignment with our essential selves. Here is Dating, Abraham style! : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_MqDLd34q_E

Dance And Sing The Dream!

We left my counselling session with me chucking away big black blobs that were interrupting the flow of energy in my body, with a little bit of help from my friends, Germain and Michael. This was only the half way point in the process, the next step was to put something more positive in the vacated areas of my being, to fill the space as it were. I ought to mention too, we made sure to purify and transmute the negative energy that was pulled out of me, leave it lying around and it may just end up coming back in. I used St Germain’s violet flame to do this but you could use anything you want, maybe imagine elves tickling the darkness into light and laughter, the only limit is your imagination.

elvesdancing

I decided on the qualities I wanted to bring in and arranged them into two sections, the first was self-confidence, authenticity and inspiration, for this I called on St Germain. The other was self-care and nurturing of self and others as well as inner peace, and it was the feminine energy of Mother Mary who came to assist me. For each of these I moved my body and made sounds, Germain was full of laughter and Mary was soft, I found myself caressing my body with great tenderness, in both cases I could feel the appropriate energies coming in very strongly. I did a drawing for each and they are up on my wall now where I can see them easily, it is a beautiful reminder of the positives I am drawing into my life and being.

I have felt a big difference in myself since my session, part of my homework was to ground myself by doing a daily exercise that involves saying my name to the nine directions and then stamping my feet as I say, “I am here, I am safe.” I can safely say that this does work to ground me, I’m also making sure that I touch my bare skin to the earth every day, just holding my staff against my forehead does this really well.

Jean Houston talks about how some African tribes approach problem solving, they dance, sing and dream about the issues as a way of finding solutions. When we do this we are using much more of the totality of who we really are, bringing in our right brains where our genius lies. So if you are trying to solve problems in your life see if you can bring in more of your fullness as you contemplate whatever it is you are trying to achieve, it’s more fun too, and that can only be a good thing!

Here is a link to Jean Houston’s Mythic Life Blog: http://www.jeanhouston.com/blog/?p=69

Sweating The Big Stuff.

The heat scours me clean, breath filling all of me as it spirals from the milky way down to the core of the earth, keeping me grounded with my head in the stars. Greeting the stone people as they come bearing the gift of fire, of purification, thank you Grandmother, thank you Grandfather. Calling upon Father Sky, Grandfather, father, the Pendragon, the masculine essence, feeling my masculine energy and coming into Divine Union within, the perfect balance between the polarities. Strong masculine energy supporting, protecting, healing, loving, caring…………….

The Dance Of Attraction.

The man danced around his love

she swayed from side to side

then turned and fell quite trusting

as he caught her in his arms

Kerry Laizans:copyright Sept 2013

I burn and it is good, stripping away all illusion, whatever remains in that space has the ring of truth to it, perhaps my answers to the Gods have already been answered. Do be careful what you ask for, in the sacred inipi your strong intention can become your reality, in that space anything is possible. Clearing away whatever does not support a vision of fullness, of fulfillment of the tasks of spirit, clearing the body, mind and soul, all levels of beingness.

Gabrielle Roth talks about sweating your prayers when you dance ecstatically, sweating in the lodge has a lot in common with the dance medicine, there are so many good medicines out there these days. I hope that you have found the ones that work for you, always be prepared to open to new possibilities, life is ever-changing and fluid. Try to swim in the ocean of love more than you are “in love” with any one person, if you find someone who can swim with you in that ocean then well and good. And never forget that the most important thing of all is to have fun!

I mean with all of it, spiritual development and evolution, all kinds of relationships and connections, life is meant to be playful and light, enlightened. Let us dance lightly upon the earth as we connect with each other and ourselves, ohm shanti, shanti, shanti…………..

Awareness Is Everything.

It’s time to return to the subject of sexual energy and tantra, and also to the fact that I don’t always keep my promises to myself, or at least not exactly as I intended to. I’m thinking of a post that I wrote on March 22 2013, called “Ride The Orgasmic Wave”, in that I said that I was going to make the time and space to experiment with energy orgasms, and that I would read “Tantric Orgasm for Women” by Diana Richardson and do all the exercises in it.

Well guess what, I haven’t done either of those things, life has been like a wild storm with the occasional lull, and it’s only now in this relatively calm space that I am coming back to this subject matter. I could get into a bit of self-flagellation, or I could recognise that the huge shifts and releases that have happened since I wrote that post have actually followed the intention that I set, just in a different form. Tantra is all about the flow and release of energy and I have been doing that big time!

spirtual-energy

I remember having a conversation about sexual energy a while ago and talking about how I was freeing up my sexual energy and how you don’t need a partner to do that. It was immediately apparent that the automatic assumption of my friend was that I was talking about masturbation, now that can certainly be a part of the process, but I was thinking more about my release of old patterns, thereby making room for more of my life force energy to flow through my being.

I’ve had another bug in my system the last few days which was making me feel low in energy, a big boost to my immune system yesterday and a great yoga class this morning has me feeling like a million dollars. I can feel the life force energy surging through me and my enthusiasm is bubbling over, that brings an aliveness to my entire body and especially to my breasts, which is the positive pole in women. If you are having sex without awareness of the more subtle interplay of masculine and feminine energies, then you may actually find that you are less energised afterwards.

At the end of the day it is the awareness that you bring to everything that you do that makes the difference to your enjoyment of life. Don’t be a sleep-walker, pay attention and be awed by the beautiful and precious nature of life on this planet!

blue geen planet

With great reverence and love and a healthy dash of playfulness!

If you are looking for more information on sacred sexuality I can highly recomend Mukee Okan, here’s her web site:

http://www.spiritfireproductions.com/bio.htm

Moving Is The Medicine…….For Me.

In the scheme of balancing out the inner journey, going deeply into exploration of self, there should probably be something about what is going on out in the broader community at this point in the flow of blog. I’m sorry but I can’t get my head out of my navel, is it ok with you if I keep it there for a while, such a lot of movement in me of energies that are full of celebration as I transmute in the golden glowing centre of my being. I am still very much in the flow of the Divine Mother, feeling the Goddess in myself and as I am truly in my receptive feminine, I feel a connection with the male polarity that is quite delicious.

ecstaticdance

A night in the ocean of love helping to create a coming together of good music, great connections, good dancing, and breath-taking generosity, when we do support each other we do it rather well in my town. And I feel that support and love wherever I go, as well as the stimulation of world-class acts like Linsey Pollak and the Unusual Suspects, what an afternoon was had swirling to those Balkan beats!

A space where each and every person is expressing their particular take on the world, some crazy, wacky styles………..and everybody is accepted for who they are, a relief to be able to totally relax into the joy of the moment. And to ride the ecstatic wave that is the journey that my body and the frequencies embark on together, dancing is an important part of my medicine, I shift energies in my body when I dance. And I have anchored the energies created by a large gathering over a couple of days, grounded the energy as I danced………….feeling the entire gathering glowing in the night, the day……the night.

“If you put the body in motion, you will change. You are meant to move: from flowing to staccato, through chaos into lyric and back into the stillness from which all movement comes. ”

Gabrielle Roth, Maps to Ecstasy, p 204.

When you dance ecstatically you are on a deep inner journey, where the stillness is as important as any movement you might make. The intention that you bring to the practice is also really integral to creating a flow that takes you into the next eddy of so-called time and space! Journey well my friends, whatever your medium.

Look for the woman with red hair and a flower in it, black and white top,  dancing at the very beginning of this clip, yes that’s me! The Unusual Suspects are an awesome band, we are so blissfully blessed in this town, enjoy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UIy7F78ODMY

The Cathedral Of Sound.

Rising from sickness she marshalls her energy and prepares for the ceremony of healing, dressing with great care and attention to detail, her heart begins to soften and open. The scene is set and filled with the laughter of children and unseen sprites, dancing with joy through the sacred space, the sense of community, of belonging, fills her with the energy of love. Friendly faces abound and call out to our heroine, reminding her that she is never ever alone, the Goddess is within her, and in this place is seen and acknowledged.

The bad spirits are fleeing as she drinks the fiery brew that brings her to new levels of sensitivity, that opens up even more of the Goddess within, the hearth fire that lies at the centre of all of us. The energy of the masculine dances around her feeling the strength and delight of her fair form, desiring to connect with her deep femininity. Her softness responds and she enjoys the dance, but then ’tis time for the dance of the soul to begin, the alchemical transformation that will banish the sickness as if it had never been.

Me dancing with orbs! Photo by Antara May.

Me dancing with orbs!
Photo by Antara May.

Whirling and swirling, her body moves in a continuous flow as she becomes a channel for the energy of the sound, angel orbs play in the frequencies as she sends the light up through her crown. Ecstatic spaces within and without as the movement transmutes and transforms, the magicians holding the space in this cathedral finding ever more transcendent levels of prayer. The Goddess fills our heroine with her energy until the two are indistinguishable, the mystery is complete and somewhere in the levels of existence a candle is lit.

The Earth smiles…………..and so do I, for she is me and I am her, the heroine is my story, and I choose to be the Goddess in myself, in all things. Praise the Goddess for she is healed!

Here is a youtube clip of the magicians of sound who created the space for us to move in ecstasy through, Hayden Hack Infusion:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=quPMnNXEf4g

The Red Shoes.

thewrittenreel.wordpress.com

thewrittenreel.wordpress.com

There is a sense of completion all around me, the ripples of my actions creating endings, and new beginnings. When I follow those ripples out into the ocean of love I am filled with the excitement of my own potential. But I also need to be careful not to get too far ahead of myself, it comes back always to balance and being present in the moment that I am in.

At times I am so impatient, like Juliet as she waits for the day to end so that she may be with her Romeo:

Spread thy close curtain, love-performing night,

That runaway’s eyes may wink, and Romeo

Leap to these arms untalked of and unseen.

Lovers can see to do their amorous rites

By their own beauties; or, if love be blind,

It best agrees with night.Come, civil night,

Thou sober-suited matron, all in black,

And learn me how to lose a winning match,

Played for a pair of stainless maidenhoods.

William Shakespeare.

But it is not simply a partner that I am singing up here, it’s an entire new life in a world that has gone through such enormous changes since the Summer Solstice 2012. And divine timing is always such an important aspect of the process, flowing with the current, where the energies naturally want to go.

But I’m human and so I come in and out of that easy current and of course there are sometimes storms that blow in as well . At the end of the day it’s my response that determines how I travel, it creates my reality based on the impetus of what is actually happening around me. What is particularly nice at the moment is that not a lot of stuff is coming up and I am shifting it fairly quickly when it does. Praise the Goddess, and a special thanks to the feminine flow for guiding me towards the amazing bargain of getting the last pair of red boots on crazy sexy special, perfect fit!

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Couldn’t find the french version of Prokofiev’s Romeo and Juliet that I remember as being particularly good, but this one shows Margot Fonteyn and Rudolf Nureyev dancing together, the energy between them is electric!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HtBRN5BXt6o