The dance was a journey that we all enjoyed, the small group of seasoned dancers all expressing their delight at the opportunity to let loose in any way they choose. It’s a kind of moving meditation where you are letting your body respond to the soundscape, moving through different scenes as the music takes you on a journey into the self. It isn’t so often that we get much space to move around when dancing out in the world, and there are usually people watching which changes the experience.
To dance in a darkened space with very soft lighting, everyone is focused on their own flow of movement so each person is dancing as if nobody is watching. There is a sense of freedom in this process which carries the seeds of great joy as energy flows more freely through the systems of these organic moving figures. They have the chance to let go, to transform whatever it is in them that needs to move.
I am feeling enormous gratitude and a lot of excitement at the possibilities that are opening up for my shared future with my Beloved. We can work together and play together and generally have a good time while helping to birth the new age of humanity, who said that change couldn’t be fun!
And that my friends is all I have to say at the moment, there is much to think upon. I never get tired of this quote from Gabrielle Roth:
“If you put the body in motion, you will change. You are meant to move: from flowing to staccato, through chaos into lyric and back into the stillness from which all movement comes………..The spirit in motion heals, expands, circles in and out of the body, moving us through the layers of consciousness from inertia to ecstasy. Open to the spirit, and you will be transformed.”
Maps to Ecstasy, Gabrielle Roth, Nataraj Publ., Novato, CA, 1989.
Passion ignites desire and eyes spark, as lips meet in prayers of fire, as a seemingly molten liquid speeds through bodies lit up from within by the sweet merging of love and opening. A thousand petals gently spreading their tenderest parts to the gaze of the Beloved, feeling the threads of light that connect us to all things, the quantum galaxy of swirling particles. The soul exposed in all its depth and stirring, stirring the stuff that lies within that is finally ready to let go, to let go, to let go………….
The body is finished with this flow, no longer in a super sensitive frame but taking great gulps of sensation as the pleasure takes me on a journey free of thought. Even as the body takes its due harvest I can feel that the ‘stuff’ that is moving is the last of this installment, this layer of the onion, only the mental body catching the last fragments as it goes by. Making worry over nothing in a vain attempt to hang on is the ego’s way of trying to stay safe, let yourself know that letting go into pleasure is the surest way to stay safe in a world that is constantly shifting and changing.
My safe harbour is always there even when there is choppy water and a storm brewing, so I can brave the dark waters knowing that I will never drown, never be lost. And as I release and release the weight of my soul I can dance lightly into the bright future that is revealed as the night’s curtain parts to reveal the birth of a brand new day!
I’ve just had a series of sudden, surreal crisis moments, its like a picture gallery in my head that I can return to and view. In the first one both horses escape and the nearby neighbours come and help us get them back in. Then when coming home later that night from dropping my dear friend who came to dinner off in town, one of the horses got out again. In spite of being novice horse handlers we managed to get a halter on the old girl and we used her to lure the other cheeky bugger back inside, it worked!
Then today I decide to shower after doing the morning feed and was feeling good as I reached for my towel. Suddenly there’s a big spider on my right breast and I’m screaming and brushing it away and running into the hall. The spider of course has made itself scarce, nowhere to be seen and no doubt quivering in its boots as my Beloved checks the bathroom. Must have scared the bejesus out of that poor critter! And I forgot to mention the removal of two large spiders from the house, what is the spider telling me?
Spider medicine has encouraged me to write in the past but I do that three times a week when I offer my posts, so perhaps I need to reflect some more on this and see if I can find a meaning that helps me to navigate. There is always a lesson in everything and if you choose to view your life in that way then you tend to have a sense of meaning or purpose. On some level I know what the next step needs to be and if I can surrender to that then I flow with the energetic currents of where I am at in my life.
Swimming against the current is exhausting and will create undue stress. People cut off from their inner selves who are not following the path of the heart are likely to experience stress as they are not in touch with the whole of their nature.
So I have a bit to reflect and think upon, I will keep you posted!
When you’re at a festival that goes for six days and offers just about every kind of music you could think of, multiple stages with workshops covering politics, environment, body, mind, and spirit, dance and song, it just isn’t possible to see everything you’re interested in. I got a pretty good system going with my highlighter pen but you have to leave room for unexpected surprises too and keep your ear to the ground to hear what other people have been discovering.
It took me the first three days to really sink down through the layers and truly inhabit the state of consciousness that is the Woodford Folk Festival, I will do my best to convey something of what that means but in the end you probably need to come and have the experience for yourself to truly ‘get’ it. I saw it as all these different threads where each person takes the parts that they are drawn to and weaves their own unique and magical experience, letting your intuition guide you is a sure way of being in the flow and that’s how I found the impressive singer songwriter from Canada, Mo Kenney.
She is an androgynous figure, very quietly spoken but with a huge stage presence and a very dry sense of humour, since looking her up online I’ve discovered she is only 23 years old, makes her even more impressive! I’m sure I wasn’t anywhere as mature as that at the same age but then I can probably be safely classed as a late bloomer, better late than never I say! The first time I saw her she finished her set with a David Bowie song I hadn’t heard in years, “Five Years”, what a fantastic version of an awesome song, Bowie would love it I’m sure.
I have been reflecting a little on the process that I have gone through in the last ten years of being not only single, but celibate. Ok so there were a couple of poor decisions in that decade and a blissful interlude with a dear friend and cuddle buddy, but essentially I was on my own and very focused on healing myself. I made a vow not to move into relationship until I had healed the patterns that led to dysfunctional behaviours, to shift my frequency and to attract something very different this time, and to hang in there no matter how long it took.
Who would have thought it would take so long! There have been so many layers to shed, it’s like the old proverbial can of worms, once it has been opened it all has to come out. And I have made a vow on more than one occasion, to heal everything in this lifetime, these vows are powerful statements of intention and if you put enough of your belief behind them they can be quite unstoppable. Hence the expression “Be careful what you ask for, the Gods may give it to you”, I have had moments when I doubted that I would ever make it to my desired outcome, in fact a big part of the process was letting go of needing an outcome.
The journey to a happy relationship is through the doorway of love of self, you need to feel worthy of happiness and joy, have the courage to speak your feelings with clarity, know that you are love itself having an earthly experience. I’ve been doing some powerful work creating a new reality for myself and these reflections remind me that spirit will do the details better than I ever could, I just need to focus on the ‘essence’ of what it is I desire to have more of in my life.
And the truly interesting thing that is happening for me at the moment? Now that I am in a space of feeling secure with my Beloved the need to fantasize about the future is quite gone, being in the present moment is more than sufficient. Fay Fairytale is using her imaginative talents to direct the movie of my life when I spend time doing my morning meditations, feels like energy is flowing well and all I have to do is follow the flow as best I can………….singing and dancing along the way!
Intense little period of activity, writing and writing in a much smaller pressure cooker which is sandwiched with languid delight and lots of satisfaction if not a lot of sleep. A recipe to be happy for me in this moment, open to the flow of energy as it charts new pathways long visioned and desired, blood running hot, a slow, sensual way of being that needs to be relaxed into. Yoga reflects this slow movement, spending long moments in stillness of pose, letting go into muscles slowly moving towards their edge, restorative pose with all the support I need, savasana……….still space edged with impatience!
Dancing from moment to moment with animal companions snuggling, kookaburra flies in to deliver his message of truth, passion and laughter, the end of the journey of healing, new growth has already begun. For a full description of this animal totem check this link out: http://solacetemple.wordpress.com/2007/11/10/kookaburra-a-spirit-bird/ Enjoying the space with just me in it even as I long to be entwined once again, one being re-united into the form of two polarities, going in and coming out, out into the cosmos and the stillness, bringing back all of that, into the merge.
Being intensely present to the scene around me, like a movie, and the one on the outside is getting more like the one I play regularly in my temple every day! You can assume by my positive tone that this is a good thing and you would be correct, my outer world has shifted massively in tune with movement in the inner realms, the flow of healthy, happy energy gives one rather a buoyant feeling in fact. I can feel that healing occurring on every level of my being, from the physical to all of the mental, spiritual, emotional realms that form the person that be me in this particular incarnation.
The more that your life force energy flows wherever it needs to, the happier you will be, even if the road is sometimes a little stony or steep, that effort and the surrender to the flow will bring light unto your sight, truth from your lips, warmth to the heart. And remember what St Germain always used to say:
I’ve got this message at the top of my screen, it is trying to get me to change security settings and it’s all very serious and I am having trouble wrapping my head around what I actually need to do. I’m bobbing along in a bubble of happiness and joy and it can be a bit challenging to come to earth and do practical things, particularly not being the most practical of persons naturally. But I am doing my best and in the meantime exploring what it feels like to be so happy, everything seems easy from this space and the flow happens, in whatever is the most efficacious manner.
And things keep changing but there is a new continuity in my life that changes everything, I manage neurotic pets, writing commitments, shopping and yoga, giving a massage and getting my hair done, all in preparation for time with my Beloved. And time in my community, where I am constantly connecting with beautiful people who celebrate with me my joys, support if I do sorrow. Life is actually pretty good as we approach the Summer Solstice, the completion of what felt like a very important cycle to me, some of it quite painful, but the clarity on the other side is well worth it!
Really challenge yourself and see what comes up, sit with the feelings and if you can let it be a journey then it may take you into a deeper awareness of body, mind……soul………heart. If you don’t like the feelings and the types of outcomes they tend to produce, then be present with the discomfort, you can let go of that stuff forever. Feels like I have let go of rather a lot of heavy stuff that I really didn’t need anymore, life is both simpler and more complex, in the most delightful way!
Just like this song from Mary Poppins, “A Spoon Full of Sugar”, you have to love Julie Andrews, she is just perfect in this role and what a voice!
Energy rises through the column of space and time that is me in this particular place known as planet Earth, it coils with sensuous grace as my kundalini bursts forth, the final shackles thrown away as I dance out of prison into the light. Luscious thoughts snaking through a mind that cannot seem to hold on to a worry or a doubt, letting the fresh breeze of my new beginning blow away anything that will not serve in this Golden New Age of love and prosperity.
Heart opens and opens, sending a delicious thrill to the nipples who are singing a song of creativity and flow, of surrender to the force of life and a spiral upwards into the pure space of inspiration. Tender distraction tugs at a mind doing its best to stay focused on the everyday, luring my thoughts into memory of touch and sound, of vibrating cells and a magical time out of time, a place you never really want to leave. So the trick then is to somehow stay there even as life pulls you into its stream, bringing with you the sense of joy and discovery, of playfulness and love.
Time to merge everything into the wholeness that is where it all began, a circle that circles within a circle, drawing our spirits into the centre of the heart, the place where transformation is a daily event. That fire will purify even the darkest of thoughts and actions and give wings to the angels who have lost their way, halos knocked askew as they go searching for the meaning to an ever-changing life. Fly with good intention and the winds of desire will always lift you up into a place where you will see the whole shebang from the perspective of an eagle, with clarity too.
I am in the flow for sure, but what if your flow is a whirlpool spinning you madly as you head towards the rapids with you know not what waiting, maybe a drop into a waterfall. That might be an amazing experience as you fall through, drops of water sparkling with the sunshine beaming through and rainbows glittering, a safe landing into the next pool of life is an exciting journey. Stay in your heart and trust is an important key, one thing at a time even if you have a lot of things to accomplish in a day.
Let there be stillness even in a busy day, find it in yourself if it isn’t in the environment around you and you are unable to make a change. Connect to nature even if it is simply a piece of wood, a flower or perhaps the leaf of a potted plant, if you can get your bare feet in the earth even better. That stillness is always within your being, let the mind relax and beyond the chatter is a great still pool that is never really disturbed, we sometimes lose our connection with it and from this stems a tide of people who feel unfulfilled. Somewhere in their sleeping is the knowledge that there is more at greater depth, but their fear holds them back, they pretend to know but it is naught but a pretty facade once one has seen through it.
How would it be to remain without tuning in to that deeper place that our feelings can take us to, if we have the courage to sit with them no matter what they might be. Anger, fear, jealousy and resentment, grief and loss……….who wants to sit with that! But if you do you will begin to go deeper than ever you knew was possible, moving the veil aside so that all potential is revealed, the quantum soup, zero point field. You don’t have to dive in as deeply as I did into a Dark Night of the Soul that felt at times like the very pits of Hades, not fun but ultimately enlightening!
When you have shared time with another soul in those incandescent places where hearts are open and you are honestly questing for more and more life, there is a deeper connection that doesn’t even really need words. To be in a community much like that, well you know I actually live somewhere a bit like that, life here is a blessing in the vibrant and creative life bursting from all sides.
Thank you Mother Earth for your bounty, Father Sky for the sunshine and the air, thank you life, ohm shanti, shanti, shanti……………………
Shifting from fear to wonder and riding the storm, short, sharp and intense, but no longer ushering in a dark sky that is wont to bring the clouds that prevent me from seeing my own bright light. The sense of doom sitting in the pit of my belly a relic of the past that I leave further behind with every breath, trusting that every step that I take is an integral part of the picture that I am painting in inner realms.
Trust, trust…………surrender to what is and move with my own precious flow, plucking the jewels that lie along the way, glittering like stars and offering me such a rich array of bounty. Within the deepest parts of self the sands are shifting, uncertain footing giving the illusion of shaky ground, a sense of falling……………turns to freedom and wings taking flight.
Letting go into the unknown as the heart’s wisdom opens door after door, fractal beauty speaks to my DNA and I AM so excited as creativity unfolds with each release of the force of life. Less and less do I resist, the creeping mist, burns off with morning’s rays, shining like the gleaming gold of treasure buried, of dragon’s hoard.