Tag Archives: light

Abandoned In The Darkness I Open To The Light.

Posted on February 12, 2014 | Leave a comment

light-in-the-darknessA new chapter is often fraught with risks and uncertainties as well as great treasures and rewards, this is very much the case for me at the moment as I navigate my way through this time of birthday celebrations. It began with a couple of big journeys as I sat in my medicine circle over two nights, there was a lot of energy moving and it wasn’t very comfortable, downright tortuous if you must know, but worth it for the light streaming out at the end of the tunnel. I was very aware as I was in the darkness that my willingness to face that part of myself would ultimately help me to sink deeper into the ocean of bliss that is available to us all!

sunset water

The story continues as I encounter old feelings of rejection and abandonment, my beautiful lover had to leave my bed to get some sleep as I snored in his ear and that triggered all of that old stuff even as I knew that he had not really left me at all. But when the feelings are moving through and telling me that I’ve lost my Beloved, that he’s angry or pissed off with me, it is very hard for the rational part of me to have any impact in what’s going on in my inner world. Luckily my Beloved and I are not afraid to talk about these things, we share with each other openly and honestly everything that is happening inside. It’s scary sometimes to be so open and vulnerable to another human being, but the more that we do it the deeper we dive into an intimacy that goes beyond anything that I have experienced in my life so far.

soulmates

Feeling emotionally drained but at the same time so very grateful for this incredible relationship that is helping me to let go of so much that was not supporting me in my life. I finally feel safe enough to go to places that were too frightening to visit without someone to hold my hand, to hold space as I navigate my path from the darkness to the light.

Thank you Beloved, you mean the world to me, and my world is a much brighter place for having you in it!

And the song that sums it up for me from Deva Premal and Miten, “Till I was  loved by you”: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZL8m_wj1li8

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , , ,

Dark Nights And Bright New Days.

Posted on November 29, 2013 | Leave a comment

I am in the flow for sure, but what if your flow is a whirlpool spinning you madly as you head towards the rapids with you know not what waiting, maybe a drop into a waterfall. That might be an amazing experience as you fall through, drops of water sparkling with the sunshine beaming through and rainbows glittering, a safe landing into the next pool of life is an exciting journey. Stay in your heart and trust is an important key, one thing at a time even if you have a lot of things to accomplish in a day.

waterfallrainbow

Let there be stillness even in a busy day, find it in yourself if it isn’t in the environment around you and you are unable to make a change. Connect to nature even if it is simply a piece of wood, a flower or perhaps the leaf of a potted plant, if you can get your bare feet in the earth even better. That stillness is always within your being, let the mind relax and beyond the chatter is a great still pool that is never really disturbed, we sometimes lose our connection with it and from this stems a tide of people who feel unfulfilled. Somewhere in their sleeping is the knowledge that there is more at greater depth, but their fear holds them back, they pretend to know but it is naught but a pretty facade once one has seen through it.

stillness2

How would it be to remain without tuning in to that deeper place that our feelings can take us to, if we have the courage to sit with them no matter what they might be. Anger, fear, jealousy and resentment, grief and loss……….who wants to sit with that! But if you do you will begin to go deeper than ever you knew was possible, moving the veil aside so that all potential is revealed, the quantum soup, zero point field. You don’t have to dive in as deeply as I did into a Dark Night of the Soul that felt at times like the very pits of Hades, not fun but ultimately enlightening!

consciouslove

When you have shared time with another soul in those incandescent places where hearts are open and you are honestly questing for more and more life, there is a deeper connection that doesn’t even really need words. To be in a community much like that, well you know I actually live somewhere a bit like that, life here is a blessing in the vibrant and creative life bursting from all sides.

Thank you Mother Earth for your bounty, Father Sky for the sunshine and the air, thank you life, ohm shanti, shanti, shanti……………………

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

The Underworld.

Posted on November 27, 2013 | Leave a comment

Fluttering, delicate wings churning my belly into a tightness that coils into itself, as excitement and anticipation coupled with fear, turn into an anxious dread. Knowing that its opposite is simply a thought away, I breathe into that turbulent swirl that turns and turns, creating a vortex of energy that can take me into even greater fear………..or ecstasy. Air, the stuff of life, pours into my waiting lungs, and directed into the pit of doom it carries me deeper and deeper, as I surrender to the downward spiral, making friends with the darkness, letting go into night.

underworld

The relief as I fall into the space of the underworld, that hell on earth that we make for ourselves when the monsters of the depths go unrecognised and unacknowledged, luminescent light becomes possible, as we find eyes that will gaze upon the face, that will take us into a fuller knowledge of the soul beneath the mask. I take my courage in both hands, and I descend like all the mythic characters that have gone before me, to meet the ruler of the shadow, the opposite of light.

three-headed-dog

Meeting each challenge with an open heart, my mind a sword that cleaves through old patterns, my feelings showing the way into balance, I battle the three-headed dog and gain entrance to the center of all that hides from sight. A figure stands before me but I cannot see its face, my shaking hands tear the veil and my eyes are open wide with fright, terror coursing through my veins I look upon the greatest monster of all, ’tis myself.

In that moment consciousness opens into laughter and the absurd nature of life becomes a juice to sweeten the sadness and the grief, the struggle and the pain. If I made all of this then I can unmake it if I choose, no longer a pawn in the world I can wake up if I want to………..or not. The old nightmare is over and I face my demons with a song on my lips and feet that move in a spiral dance that feeds the flow of energy, connected to all things.

enlightenment-and-the-self

I AM the light, I AM the dark, I AM everything and I AM nothing……..I AM THAT I AM and that is all.

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , , , ,

Prosperous Shifting Sands.

Posted on November 17, 2013 | Leave a comment

Shifting from fear to wonder and riding the storm, short, sharp and intense, but no longer ushering in a dark sky that is wont to bring the clouds that prevent me from seeing my own  bright light. The sense of doom sitting in the pit of my belly a relic of the past that I leave further behind with every breath, trusting that every step that I take is an integral part of the picture that I am painting in inner realms.

Trust, trust…………surrender to what is and move with my own precious flow, plucking the jewels that lie along the way, glittering like stars and offering me such a rich array of bounty. Within the deepest parts of self the sands are shifting, uncertain footing giving the illusion of shaky ground, a sense of falling……………turns to freedom and wings taking flight.

Letting go into the unknown as the heart’s wisdom opens door after door, fractal beauty speaks to my DNA and I AM so excited as creativity unfolds with each release of the force of life. Less and less do I resist, the creeping mist, burns off with morning’s rays, shining like the gleaming gold of treasure buried, of dragon’s hoard.

I am the treasure and I am found, I am here, homeward bound, I am here, sacred pure sound, I am the one receiving the sun, flower is open, time to have fun!

Speaking of dragons, we are about to meet Smaug, for fans of The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings, check out this trailer if you haven’t already!

Bilbo - The Hobbit 2 Movie

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , ,

It’s Darkest Before The Dawn.

Posted on November 5, 2013 | Leave a comment

If the world is a reflection of me then what an earth was I thinking, time to let go of the old bits and pieces lying around, covered in cob webs and giving succour to spiders and other denizens of the micro world. If I can clean the whole house from top to bottom, this aching weariness may dissolve and I will spiral in joyful flight into a future that is a blank page, waiting for me to paint my picture!

cobweb

So ’tis time to let the imagination run wild and to lift this particular soul into a heaven on earth, an earthly choir that rivals the heavenly kind, with halos and glowing auras aglow in the soft moonlight. Sounds of laughter and music and celebration abound in this place of peace, combining solitude with connection in just the right balance, like yin and yang, sun and moon………….masculine and feminine.

christenergy

Bodies filled with vigour and life, taking in the warm sunshine of nature renewed and loved, cared for with the tenderness we offer to the tiny child just departed from the womb, still attached to the placental source of all nourishment. No longer needing to break the softness of entry with blazing lights and harsh first breath, the world has become a safe place for you and me, for us all.

From FaceBook.com/Quantumfractal

From FaceBook.com/Quantumfractal

As I move into completeness of self, my light adds to the growing brilliance beginning to light up the world, more and more souls are joining the awakening of spirit, ushering in an age of harmony and love. Even as the darkness may seem to grow and prosper, know that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel, not just for me, but for all of us, for all of us…………….

It’s always darkest before the dawn
when your world is weary,
when all is dark,
when dreams die and fade away,
and all of life is stark,
take heart in gentle love,
for she waits in the wings,
and where she walks,
fairies dance and angels sing,
though you cannot see her,
she weaves a silken touch,
leaving footprints in the sand,
sprinkling spells and such,
lighting the dampened corridors,
the dark corners of your mind,
leaving you breathless,
bewildered by her kind,
goodness glints in her eyes,
hope is in her arms,
and all you’ve ever dreamed of,
rests sweetly in her charms.

By J. Blagojevic.

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Summer Sounding.

Posted on October 10, 2013 | 2 comments

There is a stillness and an intensity about summer that sings its siren song through the cells of my body, along with the heat and the shrill sound of the cicadas, a part of me feels itself home. Times when young mind and body moved inside air conditioning to moist heat, to the perfection of the dry, dry warmth, and the cool, cool night. Holidays spent camping when it always seemed to be summer, and the months reached on and on into an endless time of sand and ocean wave, flies and christmas beetles.

australiansummer

Today I can feel a touch of cooler Spring air, yet the Summer rushes apace, couldn’t even properly wait for Winter to wrap up her icy wind and misty mien, she came she went, she is gone. The climate she be a changing as so we are told, how can we come into coherence with all things, that we may know the right thing to do for the much larger picture, reaching all the way to the black hole beyond the milky way.  Treat everyone with respect is a good place to start, we all have important gifts to contribute to this beautiful space-time reality that we’ve currently agreed to participate in!

Dragonfly

And be present in the moment you are in, mine is a summery flow that stretches out into eternity, it’s a day with no borders from the senses of a child, when summer never ends, or so it seems. And in this moment there is nothing to be stressed about, life is suspended like the dragon-fly in the air, sparkling bright orange in the sunlight before coming to land on the clothes line. Dragon fly brings me messages about transformation and consciously working with the light to create particular reflections, being adaptable and letting the emotions flow and be aligned with the mental body. The orange speaks to me of the sacral chakra and the continuing release and flow of my life force energy, creativity opening up in new pathways, and Aphrodite’s sweet presence warming my core.

Love and harmony to all, ohm shanti, shanti, shanti……….

Here are some summer thoughts from Josh Pyke:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q1ABbLlKTlw

2 Comments

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , ,

The Time Is Now.

Posted on October 3, 2013 | Leave a comment

My roots reach deeply into the ground, the earth, the soil, the place where love comes from, even as my branches and leaves receive sunlight’s joy. Meeting in my heart, these gentle and striking energies join together in delicious merge, polarities becoming one, complementary forces making love. I stand tall, and receive this flow into every cell of this marvelous vehicle made of flesh and bone, an organic being of light.

godgoddesstree

Conscious of the glow in each molecule, inspiration feeding the river that looks for spirit’s markers, and goes where it will. A choice in every moment, the chance to say yes, to embrace the unknown………..from microcosm to macrocosm, feeling the sweetness of trust, of sacred journey. With each step a growing awareness, ’tis time to release the weights that have dogged the path before thee, that have held thee from being at one with God, the all that is.

Letting go into softness and feeling clarity and purpose welling up in place of that which was no longer needed, knowing as much as I need to know, no more. I step into a new chapter that contains so much hope it fills my entire being with star light, my friends from faraway places reach out to each and every one of us, you only have to ask, you only have to ask.

body-of-light

This is now, all points in time merge into a single pointed facet that reflects the end and the beginning of absolutely everything, we are awakening and the time is now, and now and now……….. Wake, oh wake dear sleepers, you have been sleeping for so long, and what dreams you have created, now turning to dust and blowing away upon the winds of change.

It is time, “We are the ones we’ve been waiting for.”

For the full Hopi prophecy check out this link: http://www.matrixmasters.com/takecharge/hopi-prophecy.html

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

The Sea Of Unknowing.

Posted on October 2, 2013 | 2 comments

Life is like a great cloud of fairy dust sparkling with motes of light, interspersed with moments of shadow, our breath like the wind sighing through it all, as we walk and we dance and we sing. As we dream, ah the wild and fulsome ripples of our deepest self, expressing that which we cannot see when the sun doth shine, the night-time bringing its wisdom in strange and abstract ways. Reflections of truth half heard and glimpsed from the corner of the eye, blink and ye may miss it, focus and it be gone.

At sea in such a fog I can barely tell if it be day or night, knowing the path is there whether it can be seen or not, knowing each step in the moment it must be taken, knowing this is the time, the place. Angels beckon from the heavens above even as the Mother extends her earthy embrace to hold me tight, a bridge between the worlds, a streak of light from above to below. I am connected to everything, the bright energy running through my body is the same that lights the milky way, that fills the night sky with iridescent glow as fireflies dance and the dolphins swim.

glowingocean

Letting go of everything that I think I know, I am left with the emptiness of the void, the restfulness of complete surrender to this moment, to the unknown future, and a past that changes as I do. If the mind’s eye doth cast its own shadow, how can we ever really know for sure, the exact shape and texture of our life. Trust is all that’s left, and a heart that opens to embrace all things, a precise record not necessary when feelings flow through channels of joy, when the response to being alive is to love, and to love, and to love.

2 Comments

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Dance And Sing The Dream!

Posted on October 1, 2013 | Leave a comment

We left my counselling session with me chucking away big black blobs that were interrupting the flow of energy in my body, with a little bit of help from my friends, Germain and Michael. This was only the half way point in the process, the next step was to put something more positive in the vacated areas of my being, to fill the space as it were. I ought to mention too, we made sure to purify and transmute the negative energy that was pulled out of me, leave it lying around and it may just end up coming back in. I used St Germain’s violet flame to do this but you could use anything you want, maybe imagine elves tickling the darkness into light and laughter, the only limit is your imagination.

elvesdancing

I decided on the qualities I wanted to bring in and arranged them into two sections, the first was self-confidence, authenticity and inspiration, for this I called on St Germain. The other was self-care and nurturing of self and others as well as inner peace, and it was the feminine energy of Mother Mary who came to assist me. For each of these I moved my body and made sounds, Germain was full of laughter and Mary was soft, I found myself caressing my body with great tenderness, in both cases I could feel the appropriate energies coming in very strongly. I did a drawing for each and they are up on my wall now where I can see them easily, it is a beautiful reminder of the positives I am drawing into my life and being.

I have felt a big difference in myself since my session, part of my homework was to ground myself by doing a daily exercise that involves saying my name to the nine directions and then stamping my feet as I say, “I am here, I am safe.” I can safely say that this does work to ground me, I’m also making sure that I touch my bare skin to the earth every day, just holding my staff against my forehead does this really well.

Jean Houston talks about how some African tribes approach problem solving, they dance, sing and dream about the issues as a way of finding solutions. When we do this we are using much more of the totality of who we really are, bringing in our right brains where our genius lies. So if you are trying to solve problems in your life see if you can bring in more of your fullness as you contemplate whatever it is you are trying to achieve, it’s more fun too, and that can only be a good thing!

Here is a link to Jean Houston’s Mythic Life Blog: http://www.jeanhouston.com/blog/?p=69

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Don’t Be Afraid Of The Dark.

Posted on September 15, 2013 | Leave a comment

When we talk about stuff coming up, most people automatically assume that something negative or difficult is responsible for the triggering. But that isn’t always the case, sometimes you can have experiences that are blissful and ecstatic that bring up uncomfortable feelings. My deep connection with Mother Earth that I spoke of in my last post is an example of this, although the stuff that came up was like light butterflies zooming around in my belly, and the feeling that eventually came up was a gentle sorrow.

butterfliesmulti

I am in a period of great clarity having shifted an enormous amount of stuff over the last ten months, so what is coming up for me at the moment when it does happen is pretty easy to deal with. But that isn’t always the case, and it can make people resistant to the process of moving into their fullness however they may be approaching it. On some level they are aware that discomfort could arise and that brings up the resistance to letting go of the old patterns of behaviour.

I am reminded of that wonderful quote from Marianne Williamson:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.”

I gave a sound and body healing session to a friend yesterday, and that’s what got me thinking about this subject matter. It was beautiful and flowed very organically, the words that came out of my mouth, my movements and sounds, all pure channeling. I was very much in my fullness and it was a wonderful experience for her and for me. She stayed on for a cuppa and as we talked I gradually began to feel rather strange inside my body, a little bit nauseous and disconnected from myself and the world around me. It wasn’t very comfortable at all, but after she’d gone I did a short meditation that brought peace into my body, as I let go of the swirling energies, coming back into balance again.

sunclouds

So don’t let potential darkness stop you from stepping into the spot light and showing off all your gifts and talents to the world, without the dark how would we know what light was? I speak with the knowledge of someone who has spent most of her life hiding her light under a bushel, and I know how hard it is to come out. If I can do it anyone can………………..what is it that you really want to do, what is your passion, your heart song……….follow it to your bliss, and don’t be afraid of the dark!

Which reminds me of a beautiful song, here is “You’ll never walk alone” from the musical “Carousel”: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6V9EbnNx6U

 

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , ,