I’ve got this message at the top of my screen, it is trying to get me to change security settings and it’s all very serious and I am having trouble wrapping my head around what I actually need to do. I’m bobbing along in a bubble of happiness and joy and it can be a bit challenging to come to earth and do practical things, particularly not being the most practical of persons naturally. But I am doing my best and in the meantime exploring what it feels like to be so happy, everything seems easy from this space and the flow happens, in whatever is the most efficacious manner.
And things keep changing but there is a new continuity in my life that changes everything, I manage neurotic pets, writing commitments, shopping and yoga, giving a massage and getting my hair done, all in preparation for time with my Beloved. And time in my community, where I am constantly connecting with beautiful people who celebrate with me my joys, support if I do sorrow. Life is actually pretty good as we approach the Summer Solstice, the completion of what felt like a very important cycle to me, some of it quite painful, but the clarity on the other side is well worth it!
Really challenge yourself and see what comes up, sit with the feelings and if you can let it be a journey then it may take you into a deeper awareness of body, mind……soul………heart. If you don’t like the feelings and the types of outcomes they tend to produce, then be present with the discomfort, you can let go of that stuff forever. Feels like I have let go of rather a lot of heavy stuff that I really didn’t need anymore, life is both simpler and more complex, in the most delightful way!
Just like this song from Mary Poppins, “A Spoon Full of Sugar”, you have to love Julie Andrews, she is just perfect in this role and what a voice!
From expansion to contraction, waking to a day where I don’t haveto do anything, and then feeling like I am not being very effective in anythingthat I’m doing. Uneasy belly wants me to go back to bed and stay there, but I force myself to get on the lap top and begin the process of looking for a subject for this post. The subject ends up being how I can’t seem to settle on anything today, not exactly something that is going to set the world on fire.
I have a look at “The Art of Non-Conformity” and even that is not rocking my boat, I guess I could try going back to “Tantric Orgasm for Women” but I suspect even that won’t lift me as it usually does. Then I hear Kookaburra calling and I am reminded that laughter is a wonderful medicine to lift the spirits, even listening to the sound and my belly quiets down a bit. I’ve been noticing the sound of the kookaburra quite a lot lately, could it be that I need to lighten up a bit?
It’s easy to fall into the trap of taking life too seriously, especially when you are coming out of expanded states back into consensual reality, just acknowledging the fact begins to reduce the stress. Then I take a few deep breaths and I begin to tune in to the stillness that is always waiting within, the cicadas outside begin to sound and my belly softens as I let go of tension. And in that still space I begin to realise that my fears and doubts have been stirred up in the sacred space over the weekend, this is the discomfort that I need to sit with and it’s ok to be feeling like that.
I’m beneath the water line now, the tip of the iceberg far, far above me as I dive into the deepest parts of me. Letting go of EVERYTHING, the notion of being imperfect, of somehow not being good enough, a superficial idea created by superficial people who are not really worth giving attention or focus to, ( I include myself in that last description!) I LET GO, there is nothing held in this drop into my bones, into the heaviness that needs do nothing ‘cept be, what it is in each moment, the present is a gift.
And from this place of deep rest, of relaxation and release my gifts may emerge, defined not by the expectations of others, ’tis a reaching out of soul, of love and life. I am whole and in that wholeness I heal not only myself but the community at large, receiving my radiant light and being uplifted by it. Giving freely and flowing through a life full of joy and delight and good music!
My medicine journey took me to exactly where I needed to go, I perceived my need as releasing certain feelings associated with a particular person. What I realised in the safe space of the sacred circle was that this was an extremely narrow view, it was the tip of the iceberg when it was all that lies below the water line that I needed to journey to. That’s where I went and I was so deep I can’t tell you exactly what happened down there, I was beyond conscious comprehension as my body rocked and jerked to assist the movement of energy.
I am now very conscious of the fact that even when I am ‘relaxing’, there is still something being held somewhere, in the letting go of my journey I actually let go of all of it. It was such a beautiful and deep rest, and I will remember that feeling and do my best to continue my healing path so that I may be in that kind of truly restful space more often.
May there be peace within me, ohm shanti, shanti, shanti……………
With the chrissy whirl still going round and round I have no time to research the significance of the snake but it is a medicine that has come to me before and so I have some idea of its meaning for me. Snakes have the ability to unhinge their jaws and take in animals much larger than themselves, having taken this huge mouthful they then slowly but surely digest their food. I am learning a lot at the moment with this blog, for me getting started was the big mouthful and now as I am doing it I begin to make sense of what I am doing, understanding and integration slowly unfolding through the digestive juices of my mind and intuition.
This is also a time of transformation on a personal and global level, and this is probably the best known aspect of snake medicine. Letting go of the old is necessary in order to transform into new shapes just as the snake sheds its skin in order to be reborn. I am shifting from the old Kerry who was insecure, felt unworthy, and could not allow abundance to flow in her life, into a new improved model, like going from a broken down bomb to a sleek red Ferrari!
As I engage the gears of this new bio machine I feel the power within, and the life force flows through my being like sunshine glinting on the sea or a beautiful flower opening to the light. I feel enormous gratitude to the python for the message that it brought, it matters not that we are always this magnificent creature for we do forget how wondrous we are and need to be reminded over and over again, in a world that often tries to cover this burning truth.
This is an extract from a Wordsworth poem called “Intimations of Immortality from Recollections of Early Childhood”, it captures beautifully the way that our culture encourages us to fall asleep and to become ignorant of the deeper magical truths about life. It is sourced from bartleby.com.
I woke the following morning with things to do and no sign of the python so I opened the front door and left the connecting door closed hoping that the snake would take the opportunity to escape. There was no sign of it that day or the next and I began to hope that it had indeed slithered its way out of the house because I still had no idea what to do with the darn thing. I wasn’t frightened of it but I had no idea what to do with it, I knew that pythons are not aggressive or venomous but I didn’t really know how it would react if I tried to pick it up.
On the sunday evening I had been out all day and when I turned the light on for the front room lo and behold, there was the python, curled up on a pot plant crushing the life out of the poor thing. This was the closest to the door it had been, surely there was some way I could get it to go out the front door. I got a broom and tried poking it but the snake merely raised its head and looked at me with its tiny eyes, what to do? Then I had a brain wave, the pot plant was on a small table and so I pushed the table over to the door. I had to push the table half way out the door but the snake eventually got the idea and slid its way down onto the verandah and slithered away into the night, thank the Goddess, I had managed to solve the problem all by myself.
A good story to dine out on, but of course there is a deeper understanding that may be gleaned from this tale, the snake is a symbol rich in meaning and it came into the house for the Solstice 2012, very powerful medicine indeed! To find out the meaning for me look for my next post, Slithering blissings to you all…………………