This flu has finally shifted enough that I managed a full day of training for work today, hallelujah! I’m tired but also feeling very grounded after getting out of the home environment into somewhere completely different. We had an awesome facilitator and it was great to focus on something other than being sick and pissed off. This rotten flu is still in my body and may be there as a low-level thing for a bit but I do feel more myself than I have done in three weeks. Three weeks! I cannot even begin to imagine what it is like for people who are sick for months or years at a time. This experience will certainly expand my empathy for those who have health problems that go on and on, so easy to get stuck in a loop.
My loop has been broken and while I will attend to the issues that have been annoying me so much I feel like I can let go of it all until then. Holding on to things that you can’t do anything about is very counter productive but also very human. And maybe as my health continues to improve I might be able to do some fruitful investigation of some of the feelings that have been getting triggered so strongly for me. There are genuine issues that I am quite angry about but I am aware also that those same issues have triggered other deeper feelings. And when stuff comes up it is always a golden opportunity to shed more of the excess baggage that gets in the way of me being my wondrous larger self!
So a much more optimistic post this week, who knows what wonders the next week will bring as I move back into a healthier state of mind. And mindfulness and self-care too to make sure I don’t overspend my returning energy.