Tag Archives: present

The Red Shoes.



There is a sense of completion all around me, the ripples of my actions creating endings, and new beginnings. When I follow those ripples out into the ocean of love I am filled with the excitement of my own potential. But I also need to be careful not to get too far ahead of myself, it comes back always to balance and being present in the moment that I am in.

At times I am so impatient, like Juliet as she waits for the day to end so that she may be with her Romeo:

Spread thy close curtain, love-performing night,

That runaway’s eyes may wink, and Romeo

Leap to these arms untalked of and unseen.

Lovers can see to do their amorous rites

By their own beauties; or, if love be blind,

It best agrees with night.Come, civil night,

Thou sober-suited matron, all in black,

And learn me how to lose a winning match,

Played for a pair of stainless maidenhoods.

William Shakespeare.

But it is not simply a partner that I am singing up here, it’s an entire new life in a world that has gone through such enormous changes since the Summer Solstice 2012. And divine timing is always such an important aspect of the process, flowing with the current, where the energies naturally want to go.

But I’m human and so I come in and out of that easy current and of course there are sometimes storms that blow in as well . At the end of the day it’s my response that determines how I travel, it creates my reality based on the impetus of what is actually happening around me. What is particularly nice at the moment is that not a lot of stuff is coming up and I am shifting it fairly quickly when it does. Praise the Goddess, and a special thanks to the feminine flow for guiding me towards the amazing bargain of getting the last pair of red boots on crazy sexy special, perfect fit!


Couldn’t find the french version of Prokofiev’s Romeo and Juliet that I remember as being particularly good, but this one shows Margot Fonteyn and Rudolf Nureyev dancing together, the energy between them is electric!


Deep Medicine.

I’m beneath the water line now, the tip of the iceberg far, far above me as I dive into the deepest parts of me. Letting go of EVERYTHING, the notion of being imperfect, of somehow not being good enough, a superficial idea created by superficial people who are not really worth giving attention or focus to, ( I include myself in that last description!)  I LET GO, there is nothing held in this drop into my bones, into the heaviness that needs do nothing ‘cept be, what it is in each moment, the present is a gift.


And from this place of deep rest, of relaxation and release my gifts may emerge, defined not by the expectations of others, ’tis a reaching out of soul, of love and life. I am whole and in that wholeness I heal not only myself but the community at large, receiving my radiant light and being uplifted by it. Giving freely and flowing through a life full of joy and delight and good music!

My medicine journey took me to exactly where I needed to go, I perceived my need as releasing certain feelings associated with a particular person. What I realised in the safe space of the sacred circle was that this was an extremely narrow view, it was the tip of the iceberg when it was all that lies below the water line that I needed to journey to. That’s where I went and I was so deep I can’t tell you exactly what happened down there, I was beyond conscious comprehension as my body rocked and jerked to assist the movement of energy.

I am now very conscious of the fact that even when I am ‘relaxing’, there is still something being held somewhere, in the letting go of my journey I actually let go of all of it. It was such a beautiful and deep rest, and I will remember that feeling and do my best to continue my healing path so that I may be in that kind of truly restful space more often.

May there be peace within me, ohm shanti, shanti, shanti……………


The Doors of Perception.

One of the interesting aspects of house sitting, is the way that you move in and out of different energy fields, each environment has its own unique feel and I have been most fortunate in the energies I’ve encountered in this journey. The house that I have just moved out of was the perfect space for me to inhabit while I was going through some of the most fundamental shifts that I have experienced in quite a few years.

I am reborn, nothing is the same and yet at the same time nothing has really changed, the kind of contradiction that I have always thrived on, I am a creature of contradictions and strange fancies. I am reminded of how I felt as a child about some of the moves we made as a family, I can remember really noticing what it felt like to be present in a particular place and time, and how different that was from where we had been before. The difference between the sense of exploring a new environment, and being somewhere familiar.

It still comes down to perception, and as I have mentioned numerous times there is always a choice to be made in how we shall receive information about what is around us, and inside of us.  The trick is to hone your sensitivity so that you become attuned to the creation of what you truly desire to have in your existence. For most of us, automatic pilot means falling into old patterns of behaviour that keep creating more and more of what we don’t actually want in our lives.

My favourite definition of insanity is when you keep doing things the same old way and expecting different outcomes, I often use this as a challenge when I am working on the crisis phone lines. No matter how evolved you think you have become, it’s always good to be reminded of universal truths, everyone falls into old patterns of behaviour sometimes and it really isn’t a problem providing you are not blissfully sailing through a sea of ignorance.

In this particular moment of time, I am sinking into a slow current of extreme tiredness, lots of overnight shifts combining with moving out of my house sit and creating a gentle exhaustion that I shall sail into a night of blissful sleep. Oh beauteous rest, I yearn for your sweet arms to enfold me, to hold me as I sink into the deepest space of stillness.

Good night sweet prince:
And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest!

Hamlet: Act 5 Scene 2. William Shakespeare.

Goodnight, goodnight, goodnight……………I go into the darkness knowing that I shall be reborn in the light of yet another new day!