Tag Archives: self

Spring Fever.

So we have passed through the Spring Equinox and birthed into the energy of new growth and blossoms, it is a strong current this year of 2013, we are poised upon the edge of change. Just not sure how many years that edge represents, but certainly in my life time, and I expect to be around for the next 70 years or so.

blossoms

So what to do with that burst of growth, I will keep listening to the land for what I need to do in the way of ceremony, on the earth. My new-found staff held the feminine energy in the fire circle for the Equinox, initiated into the land and creating a connection with the land from which it was birthed, strengthening the song line and holding space for healing and anchoring. I am beginning to get a sense of how to begin to decorate the staff, I think it may come one step at a time but I will begin to look out for the right crystals.

But the answer to my question? Why do absolutely whatever it is that you really, really want to do, live your dream as you step into your fullness. Don’t feel like you have to do things the way they’ve always been done, mmmm……reminds me of “The Art of Non-Conformity”, another book to read, what a lot of yummy resources there are out there for our delectation. As you can probably tell I am in a juicy space after a beautiful Equinox, I’ve dropped some of my niggling doubts about my knowing, as well as surrendered to the fact that maybe it’s ok to have doubts and to simply sit with the discomfort.

But more than anything, to be true to self, to love self as deeply and profoundly as you can, I have a friend who always says, “Love Self, Do Next Thing”. I think this sums up how I need to navigate through the next little while, being that present requires a huge faith, a faith that keeps getting fanned higher so I never fall out of it for long. The biggest part of that process is having the encouragement of a hearted and beautiful community for whatever it is that I might want to explore, in public or in private.

girlfriends

Because you know I don’t tell you absolutely everything, a girl has to have some privacy! Only my good girlfriends get that privilege, do you have someone you could tell anything to who really ‘gets you’? If the answer is no then please think about how you could create that in your life, it is such an amazing support even as life challenges us.

We couldn’t get by without a little help from our friends, that’s what Joe Cocker reckons: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKnkOTTwitw

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Packing Devotion.

I wrote a post that came out about a week ago about how loving yourself is easy when you are doing fun things, but when the times get tough it can be challenging to maintain that positive outlook. So how did I go with this on my recent trip, as a matter of fact it was on the very day that post came out that I spent 12 hours sorting and re-packing my stuff!

I started off looking through the journals and bits and pieces I had written, and it was actually pretty interesting to get glimpses into my past. But I was always going to keep all of that stuff, so there came a point where I realised that I was not using my time very efficiently, however fascinating it might be. At that stage the day was almost over, and having champagne with my friend didn’t help the process either. Hence the 12 hour day where the only sorting was of things that might get thrown away, and I managed to get rid of quite a bit.

altarimage

That very long day was where I was truly tested and I have to say that I passed with flying colours! The temptation to hate what I was doing and wanting it to just be over was very strong, so I did what I always do in that situation. I made the choice to see it as an act of devotion, in this case the devotion was for self, there is something very sacred about clearing your clutter and getting more organised. It also felt like I was gathering in parts of me that had been scattered so was very much a part of becoming more whole, putting all the bits of me back together.

And I do feel different, its subtle and there aren’t really words to describe it, but I am not the same person who went down to the city just a short time ago. May these winds of change guide me as I navigate my way through the birth of a new world, my own personal reality and the larger one that holds us all.

Ohm shanti, shanti, shanti…………peace, peace, peace……….

My Guru, My Guru.

I used to think that Gurus were not such a great idea, it seemed to me that in order to have one you had to give away your power, and I was doing that enough without adding to it! I guess it would have been St Germain that would have been my guru but he was temporary in coming through Azena Ramanda, so I moved on to direct communication after that. Not being attached to a particular form, he brings me messages in many different ways. I thought having a guru on earth might be a bit of a drawback, taking the focus away from self, but after hearing stories of their guru, from Krishna Das and Ram Das, I have a different perspective.

They can be a doorway into that deeper dive into the self, into the quantum field of raw potential, a true guru will not take your power. What you choose to give away is your business, enjoy the stepping up into the limelight as you empower yourself with every step. A true guru will assist you in finding coherence, where the heart and the head and everything else is vibrating at just the right frequency, that of love. You can go there in so many ways, keep exploring doorways, it’s the evolution into a spiritual future, enlightenment.

I am my own guru these days, getting clearer and clearer on that one, developing the shamanic pathways for healing, bodywork, psychic/aura readings, sound healing, holistic counselling, writing/teaching. Lots of fun and inspiration to be had, bit more tech savvy would be good, me learning or help, don’t mind which one. But gurus can connect you to the place in yourself where you ARE LOVE, they can inspire and uplift in all sorts of different ways. Ram Dass is a guru no doubt to many, adepts or addicts, need to get stuck and then eventually be free of method, in the end we are all one in the unified field of consciousness that Rupert Sheldrake talks about, he and Bruce Lipton finally met properly and this is the conversation, its long but well worth it!

Rupert Sheldrake and Bruce Lipton.

Rupert Sheldrake and Bruce Lipton.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0o50jpPqQqA

In India when we meet and part we often say, ‘Namaste’, which means: I honor the place in you where the entire universe resides; I honor the place in you of love, of light, of truth, of peace. I honor the place within you where if you are in that place in you and I am in that place in me, there is only one of us.

~ Ram Dass

From Twilight To Joy!

The twilight world hath beckoned me in from the bright sunlight realms where I am wont to spend my time, it reminds me that wherever there is light, there will also be shadow. You cannot have the one without the other, to deny any part of this design is to deny it all, and so I surrender to my own darkness, even as I set the boundaries firm against incursions from without. For I am sovereign in my own inner space, none may come here save that they be invited.

heartsoft

I am soft and my heart is boundless, I look inside the self that I be and I become lost in the great distances that I find there. It’s like a great cavern that goes on forever, full of treasures, some well-known and others waiting to be discovered. How could I ever be lost or feel small when there is such bounty within? This is perhaps the greatest mystery of human kind, that we should look so intently outside of ourselves, for the fulfillment that lies in quite the opposite direction.

heart_of_oneness

Righteous anger gives me the strength to do the tasks that have been appointed to me, even as compassion keeps me in my heart, there are some kinds of darkness that must be dealt with, so that the integrity of the world may be restored. I do not judge, nor am I the executioner, at the end of the day I hand over to a higher power and then it is no business of mine.

I am weary, but this will pass, and I will rise even stronger for the travails that I have passed through. And always there is joy, beneath all the rest, love and joy and bliss are running always, inviting me to come and play, to dance and sing in the sun’s brightest ray!

Here is a beautiful meditation from the Archangel Michael through Annette Sassou, also known as Asara, it is an activation for the third eye: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jqbaMetiFbg

If you like this check out http://www.teloschannel.com/ for other meditations and talks.

Let The Feelings Flow.

As the cold deepens, the energy of the dark womb draws us within, Demeter is mourning for her daughter and her grief is cold as ice, as cold as the underworld where Persephone has gone. The emptiness contains all that we have pushed aside in busier and brighter times, when distractions are easy to come by, and the shadow merely an interesting shape created by the sun’s rays. But now the trees are bare, and though the sun still shines from deep blue skies,  the pull comes from within, our shadow clamouring for our attention.

Surrender to that call, let go into the stillness that you will find as you descend into your own private version of the underworld. What is it that you cannot own or accept as a part of who you be, what aspects of self have you demonised or judged as being unworthy. That which remains unacknowledged can never be transformed or set free, so let yourself be………….all of who you are, this is the key.

We all of us have parts of ourselves that we don’t like very much, if you try to ignore this truth, if you push it down into the deepest part of your being, it will become even more powerful. It will control you from a place that you may not easily be able to access, the longer this goes on the more layers will gather and the harder it becomes to identify and therefore release. Here is a piece I wrote about how I did this very thing with the guilt I felt over my father’s death when I was 15:

My guilt was a mountain the size of Everest and I buried it as deeply as that mountain is tall.

The guilt festered away in the dungeon of my soul and within a brief few years it had eaten away it all, my self-esteem, my sense of worth, my love of self was gone.

It was in the midst of terrible storms on Australia Day that I realised that I had at last rebuilt my self-esteem, 33 years after burying that which I could not face or acknowledge to myself. To read more about that check out my post “Rebirth” on January 30 2013.

Rebirth

This one act of mine shaped my entire life, I cannot regret it for it has brought me to where I am, but I offer my experience as a lesson hard learned. No matter how painful it may be, allow your  feelings to move through you, express them in the moment and let them go, just keep doing that until you are clear, as long as it takes…………..

Shanti, shanti, shanti…………peace, peace, peace…………

I Begin!

I have always been a fan of Alice in Wonderland, popping down the rabbit hole has been a habit of mine for years now and it’s an exciting and sometimes confronting journey. Like Alice I try to believe six impossible things before breakfast, and in what we now know to be a quantum universe this is starting to look like a practical description of reality.

Not that I pretend to fully understand the science behind it, but even I can see that science and the mystic wisdom of the ages are finally meeting. We have entered the vortex and are passing through into a new earth, a new humanity. What it will be like beyond the vortex I do not know but that it will be marvellous I feel quite sure. Optimism seems the best way forward, optimism powered by the energy of love which, as it turns out, really does make the world go round. The Beatles were right and Wall Street has definitely got it very wrong.

Love is all you need, but I don’t mean the kind of love you’ll find in romantic novels, where the corseted women swoon and the charming, dastardly rogue turns out to have a heart of gold and be good husband material. Oh no, we’re living in a culture that has done it’s best to create order with rigid rules about who’s supposed to love who and look at the mess we’ve created!

It’s time to clean up our mess and having the freedom to be who we are in our fullness must be a part of that. Learning how to be in my fullness is what my healing journey is all about and I hope this may provide reflections, like sunlight upon a many faceted crystal. Reflections that may find answering echoes in the souls of my fellow explorers as we embark on the most exciting journey of all, discovery of self!

ALice

Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland

Down the rabbit hole!

Down the rabbit hole!